


Once More, Once More...

by Raven_Ehtar



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Asgore POV, Body Horror, Breaking Psyche, Canon-Typical Violence, Descent into Madness, Despair, Frisk POV, Gen, Gender-Neutral Chara, Gender-Neutral Frisk, Multiple Timelines, Murder, POV Alternating, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, THIS IS MEANT TO HURT, Undertale Saves and Resets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-02
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-17 06:11:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 30,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14826842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raven_Ehtar/pseuds/Raven_Ehtar
Summary: In his garden, a King waits for the final human soul it will take to break the Barrier, contemplating what he will have to do. When the child comes, they ask only that he listen to their tale of the journey there, no matter how strange it might seem.Both have things they must do, just once more.





	1. Chapter 1

Golden flowers, gleaming in the light. A breeze stirred them, and droplets of water clinging to each petal set them to sparkling, a garden of treasured memories. 

Asgore, King of all monsters, hummed a quiet tune from brighter days under his breath, carefully making sure that each and every bloom was given its share of water from his can. It was not an easy task, convincing such beautiful surface blooms to grow so far below ground, but it was a task that he was glad to perform. It was a task which brought him some small measure of joy, though it was slightly bittersweet. Even so, it was more an escape than any of his other duties as king. 

How to battle the despair of his people as hope slowly faded away. How to convince an entire world that they _would_ escape, despite the rumbling of their bellies, and that they would not suffocate in this living tomb. How to gather the power to make his words worth more than the air it took to speak them…

The golden shimmer of the flowers caught in the rare bit of sunshine that made it to this place. The promise of something better was all he could hold on to. So much better than to remember the children that had come before, the ones who had died, the ones who were with him even now, crying out in fear and confusion. So much better than to know he would have to do it again, and soon. 

Was it really worth it?

Asgore paused, a weight heavier than the norm settling in his chest. It was a question he had asked himself countless times in the past. It never got any easier to answer. _Was_ all of this worth it? The freedom and saving of his people - his entire race - at the price of seven human souls. In terms of numbers, there was no question, but souls were not numbers, and could not be weighed against each other like grains of sand. They could only be weighed on their own, and that weight was slowly crushing him. 

Six souls were his, torn from the bodies of humans unlucky enough to fall within his reach. One was left to go - just one - and Asgore felt more like a monster than any human could have accused him of being. 

Looking on the pure loveliness of the flowers, Asgore wasn’t sure he could do it again. Not again. Not even once more. 

But if he showed mercy, then what? His people would still be trapped, and the six souls captive. Would he dare to waste their sacrifice, to risk the lives of everyone in the Underground for a single human soul? It would be genocide, if he let this one soul escape him now. 

He would do it. He knew he would. He could not allow his people to remain here, buried alive and dying slowly, the dust of them mixing with the ashes of his promises. 

The child that was coming, they would be here soon. They would free them all. Asgore would kill them, take their soul to add to the others, and finally, _finally_ they would have freedom. 

Would it all have been worth it?

Water poured, the sun shone, the flowers swayed. It was a nice day today. 

As he approached the end of the garden, his watering can growing light, a sound came from behind him. 

“Oh? Is someone there? Just a moment,” he called behind him to the monster doubtless come with some important bit of business or other. “I have almost finished watering these flowers…”

“… King Asgore.”

The king froze in place. He wouldn’t say that he could have recognized the voice of every one of his people, but he knew that this was not one of them. It was too light, too small… too human.

He took a deep breath and set down the watering can amid the flowers. Just once more, he reminded himself. He turned around to face the final murder. 

The child looked up at him. “Howdy.”

For a moment Asgore was speechless. He was never really sure what he was meant to say at times like this, anyway. After all, what did you say to someone you were meant to kill? Somehow, though, he would always find something to fill the silence, even if all he could manage was an apology. As though an apology could ever be enough for what he was doing.

Something about this child struck even those paltry words from him. Every human that had come before had needed to make the same journey as this one. It was a long, arduous trek, and any who made it more than proved the strength and determination of their soul, but it was rather hard on their bodies. That was especially true of the younger ones. The children always came before him dirty, bruised, tired, wanting nothing more than to go back home. There was something about this one, something in their eyes, in the way they held themself that brought the king up short, that whispered uncertainty to his instinct. 

They smiled at Asgore, and it wasn’t just ‘tired.’ It was a weary smile, a knowing smile that made whatever was left of Asgore’s heart ache. Their face was streaked with dirt and ash, their striped shirt torn in places and stained, there were cuts on their hands and legs, both shallow and deep. None of this seemed to weigh on the child the way Asgore thought it would. They stood, injured and travel stained, as though that was how they always were. 

It was just their eyes, their smile which made Asgore stop.

“H- Howdy…” he said after a moment. “You arrived sooner than I thought you would…” He looked around the throne room full of golden blooms, uncertain what to do next. He was certain what _should_ happen, though unwilling to proceed, and he felt wrong footed, somehow. Out of the corner of his eye he examined the child a little more closely. There was no weapon in their hands, and all the dirt upon them looked to be just that: dirt. No dust clung to their skin. 

Did that make what he had to do easier, or harder?

“It’s a nice day today, isn’t it? Birds are singing, flowers are blooming… Perfect weather for a game of catch…” he trailed off. Trying to fill the silence, he’d wandered into some painful recollections; once sweet memories turned bitter with time. Now was not the time for that. Now he must gather what courage, what resolution he could, and finish what he had begun so long ago. 

Once more, and then it would all be over.

He opened his eyes. The child was still smiling that odd, old smile, their eyes so full of sadness it physically stung him. “You know what we must do. When you are ready, please come into the next room.”

He turned away from the child and began to walk to the barrier, not watching to see if the child would follow him. It might have been a vain kind of thing, but he would at least not make himself such a demon as to drag the children to where they would die, as well as kill them. Whether or not the child followed he could say was completely their decision… though he knew it was only a lie. Where else would they go, in a world teeming with monsters who knew the key to their salvation lay in their soul?

It was a cowardly self-deception, but he was nothing if not a coward.

“Your Majesty, wait.”

Asgore stopped on the threshold, looked back over his shoulder. The child was no longer smiling, one hand held out to him as though to stop him from across the room. “Yes, child?”

Their hand lowered, and for a moment they looked embarrassed, or perhaps at a loss how to continue. They cast their eyes up to where the light streamed in. Light from a world they would never see again. 

“There’s… We have time, don’t we, King Asgore? There’s no real rush to move on. Is there?”

Asgore’s chest gave a pang. Of course it was understandable that they would do this; natural, expected, but it did not make it any easier to bear. Delaying the outcome would not change it, and would only make the pain leading up to it worse. 

“No, there’s no rush…”

“Then do me this one favor,” they said. “Sit with me. Talk with me. You don’t even have to talk yourself. Just… listen. Please.”

Asgore’s resolution to have this over with as quickly as possible wavered. He was not made to be harsh or cold hearted, and the look in this child’s face could have broken one made of stone. He could not be expected to stand before it. Still, he tried. “Child, if you hope to change what must be done--“

“Your Majesty.” For a moment Asgore found himself questioning just how much of a child this human was, they held his gaze so steadily. “I will not try to change your mind from what has to be done, from the path you think you must follow. But there are things I must say and which you must hear before we… move on. So… can you do me this one, last kindness?”

No, not even stone could have stood before this child, and Asgore was no stone. He turned back to the child, and nodded his acceptance. 

The smile returned, and the child breathed a small chuckle. “I… would love a cup of tea.”

* * *

This child was a strange one, Asgore thought to himself as he set the tray down on the table.

The child showed absolutely no fear - not of him, of their surroundings, not even of what was to come. Asgore had no doubt the child was completely aware of what was coming. Even if they hadn’t learned of it somewhere along their journey, there was a kind of fatal acceptance in their attitude that told Asgore they knew everything they needed to. Possibly more. 

That was strange enough, in Asgore’s opinion. But there was more. The child showed a sort of familiarity with Asgore’s small home that bordered on unsettling. Of course they would have had to come through it to find the throne room, but there was no hesitation, no looking to him for cues at all. They went to the large table where Asgore had his meals and sat down as though they had lived in this house for years and waited for him to make the tea. 

When Asgore returned the child was still seated where he had last seen them, but the earthen bowl full of golden flowers was missing from the table. He took a quick look around the room and spotted it, tucked almost out of sight between his comfy reading chair and the fireplace. While he had been out of the room the child had moved them. 

Perhaps they were allergic to flowers, Asgore thought. When he thought about it, the child had also not come very far into the throne room and its carpet of blooms, instead sticking to the grass. 

The thought worried him. If the child were allergic, how would they react to the tea, which had golden flowers in it?

The concern was waved aside when he brought it up. “I’m not allergic, Your Majesty. Please.”

So he poured the hot water into the pot to steep the leaves, arranged the small plate of slightly burnt cookies into a tidier arrangement, and then settled his large frame into one of the remaining chairs. 

The child did not speak, and while Asgore could think of one or two very stilted conversation starters, he attempted none of them. Something in the way the child sat told him that conversation not to do with whatever it was they wanted to tell him would be unwelcome. Instead he contemplated the child as they waited for the tea to finish brewing in silence. 

What struck him first and most forcefully was just how small they were. Tiny when compared to his own towering stature. Where he felt the chairs specifically designed for him were in danger of collapsing, the child was a toy, a doll seated in a full sized chair. Their feet not only failed to touch the floor, their knees failed to come to the edge of the seat, so their legs stuck out straight over the edge. 

_How young are they,_ he wondered? He immediately tried to banish the thought, for with it came the reminder that the younger the soul, the better to break the barrier. A human soul’s power came from its determination. To have reached Asgore in his castle would demand much of an adult. For a child to successfully make the journey was a proportionate measure of their determination, of their power. 

It was a horrifying discovery, to realize that first time that the best kind of souls would require the blood of children on his hands. Adult humans were bad enough, but _children…_

He tried to imagine what it must have been like for this child to make the journey here. What challenges and adventures they’d had to face, the kind of stubbornness it would take to keep going and not give up. Asgore eyed the scrapes adorning the child again, the cuts and bruises, the dark stains of mud, moss and other, more sinister things. Such a large world, even below ground for one so small, and so full of dangers. 

Determination. What a terrifying power to possess. 

The tea was finished brewing. He poured carefully, offered milk and sugar, added plenty of both to his own when the child declined. They held the cup clasped in both hands, absorbing the warmth. A cup from the same set which Asgore had to pinch between forefinger and thumb to maneuver. Another child, eight at most…?

Once more. Just once…

He allowed the silence to go on a little longer, long enough for the child to take a few sips of tea and finish whatever mental preparations they had to make. When he felt he had given all the time he could afford to give and not lose his nerve, he cleared his throat, a storm’s rumble in the small space. “Well, child. What is it you wished to tell me?”

For a moment the child stared into their cup, one finger scratching along its edge. Without looking up, they said something, too soft to hear. 

“I’m sorry?”

They cleared their throat. “Frisk,” they said, and Asgore still wasn’t sure he had heard correctly. The child lifted their head and looked Asgore in the eye, again startling him with their complete lack of fear. “That’s my name. Frisk. I am Frisk. That’s… important.”

Frisk. An odd name, but that wasn’t why Asgore would always remember it. He wished he’d never heard it.

“Frisk,” he said, endeavoring to smile. “It is a pleasure to meet you.”

The child - Frisk - smiled, and looked back into their cup. After a moment they set it down with a decisive _clink_ and sat up straighter. “Your Majesty, I would like to tell you a story. It’s a very long one, and I ask you don’t interrupt. Let me tell it all.”

Asgore blinked. He was on the verge of reassuring them that yes, of course he would allow them to tell whatever tale they wished to, while at the same time wondering what kind of story they could possibly want to tell him, when the child’s look made him stop at once. More than the unchildlike gravity of their gaze, there was another thing, a note of fear, a sheen of desperation clinging to them. They _needed_ to tell this story, and they needed to know that Asgore would listen, really _listen._ To all of it.

Asgore set down his cup and, with as much seriousness as he would show any adult who made a request of him, he replied, “Of course, Frisk. I will listen to your every word. That is my promise.”

The hesitant, hopeful smile that came to their face was enough to break his heart, and he had no idea why there should be so much tied up in a story. He wasn’t sure he wanted that understanding, but he would doubtless receive it by hearing what Frisk had to say.

“Thank you,” the child all but whispered. Taking another deep breath and straightening their shoulders like they were preparing for battle, they began their story.

* * *

“My name is Frisk, and I climbed up Mt. Ebott. I had heard the stories about people who had done it before and had never come back, but I did it anyway. Why… doesn’t really matter anymore.

“I climbed up the mountain, and then I fell. I fell down a long way. When I woke up I was alone, it was dark all around except for right where I was, and I was surrounded by flowers. Golden flowers, like the ones in your garden. They broke my fall, caught me. Saved me, I guess.

“I didn’t try leaving that place for a while. I was scared, and all the stories were going through my head. About how the monsters lived in Mt. Ebott, and if they caught you in their world they would never let you go. How they would eat you, or make you a slave, or just hurt you for fun. I was scared, and didn’t know what to do. 

“Eventually I did leave the flowers, even though it meant leaving the light as well. I wandered in the dark until I found my very first monster... It was a flower.

“He said his name was Flowey the flower, and that he would be my friend. That he would teach me how the Underground worked. It seemed kind of weird, a talking flower. It wasn’t what I was expecting to find, and… it was kind of a relief. I was scared of kid-eating monsters, but instead I found a flower who was going to explain things to me. So I listened to him as he explained how souls worked, and how it starts weak but can get stronger with enough LV, which was short for LOVE, and how he would show me how to do that. 

“… I didn’t know any better, then. No one at home told me about souls or LV or anything like that, so I believed him. And when he said he would show me how it all worked, I believed that, too. And he did. He tried to kill me. He almost did. But I was saved. 

“A woman came and defeated Flowey, then healed the wounds from my fall and from Flowey. She said she was a guardian, and that _she_ would help me.

“After Flowey, I didn’t know if I could trust her. I almost stayed right there, but I didn’t know if Flowey would come back, and she _had_ saved me, so I followed her. She guided me through the dark, told me that I had landed in a part of the Underground called the Ruins and that hardly anyone lived there anymore. She showed me how the puzzles that monsters use work, and how, when I got into a fight I could leave it without hurting anyone. How I should try to get out of _every_ fight without hurting anyone. She gave me a cell phone - this one, see? - and she told me I could always call her if I needed her. 

“She was strange to me. Definitely what I would call a ‘monster,’ more than Flowey, at least back then, and I kept thinking that I shouldn’t trust her. But… she was so nice. Gentle. She was so careful, worried that I would get hurt. I couldn’t be scared of her. Heh. I even asked her if I could call her ‘Mom,’ because that’s exactly what she acted like. She was surprised… but I think she was happy, too, when I asked. She said yes.

“She took me to her house, gave me a room full of toys, and even baked us a pie. She said she would watch over me from then on, would protect me, raise me, even teach me as I grew. She was ready to keep me, and be my mother for the rest of my life. It was… nice.

“But I was already starting to feel homesick. My new mom was nice, sweet, but I missed my real home. I wanted to leave the Underground and go back. I knew I couldn’t leave the same way I came, so I thought I should just keep going. Leave the Ruins, find another way back to the surface.

“My new mom didn’t want me to go. She tried to talk me out of it, tried to destroy the only door out of the Ruins to keep me there, and then tried to stop me with force. She said if I wanted to go I had to show her I was strong and could hold my own in a real fight. And I was… _determined_ to leave. 

“…

“… I didn’t know.

“I didn’t know that humans were so much stronger than monsters.

“I didn’t mean to do it.

“But she… she kept saying how I had to fight her and win if I wanted to leave, if I wanted to go home. And she was attacking _me_ as well…

“I… killed her.

“… She died so easily. I didn’t know _anything_ could die like that. She told me to be good, and then she… crumbled away to dust. I saw her soul, pure white, for a second before it crumbled away as well. I killed someone who had been so nice to me…

“Flowey had said that the only rule in this world was to kill or be killed, but I didn’t think that was true. I didn’t mean to kill her.

“It was a long time before I could leave, before I could… walk through her dust to get out. Flowey was waiting on the other side. I thought he would kill me since T-- since… Mama was dead, but he didn’t even try. He thought it was funny that I had killed her. Somehow, he knew all about it. He laughed, said he would watch more, and let me go.

“I was scared of what would be outside, but I couldn’t stay there. I ran for the door, and hoped that the way out wasn’t too far away.

“Outside, there was snow! I didn’t expect that. It’s summer out on the surface, did you know? That’s why I’m dressed like this. I wasn’t ready for it to be so cold. But I didn’t have much choice but to keep going. So I did, wondering what I would do when I met another monster, what kind of monster they would be. Mama said that the rest of the underground was hard and cruel, that I would be killed. But it seemed like there were two kinds of monster, like with people - humans, I mean. Good and bad. There were monsters like Flowey, but there was also Mama. They couldn’t be all bad. And maybe there were some who wouldn’t hate me for being human. Besides, I wasn’t sure I could kill anyone again. Even if it meant I would die instead.

“The first monsters I met in Snowdin scared me at first. They were skeletons, and brothers, and they were meant to capture any humans they found. I was scared at first, but… they both turned out to be so funny. Sans, he even said he’d keep a- an eye socket out for me. I don’t know why, but that made me feel better. He made me laugh with his dumb jokes. …I don’t think I ever thanked him for that.

“His brother Papyrus was much more serious about catching me. But all of his puzzles were so silly and easy. He didn’t joke, really, but Papyrus was funny too, and he made me laugh even more than Sans. And even though he really wanted to catch me, none of his traps were very good. I don’t think he _really_ wanted to catch me, actually. He wanted a friend. But he also wanted to be in the Royal Guard. So we did fight. 

“I was so scared of hurting him. I tried everything but fighting. I even tried flirting! But he insisted I fight… so I pretended to fight, but never actually hit him. He hit _me,_ but that was okay. That was better than hurting him. Better than killing him.

“Eventually the fight ended, and we were friends. It was so weird. He was so weird, but… I was just so happy he was okay. It didn’t matter if it didn’t make any sense. We even went on a date! Papyrus had no idea how dates work and had an instruction book. He was so funny. So happy to have a friend. So was I.

“I met a lot of nice monsters at Snowdin Town. None of them knew I was a human. It’s been so long that no one remembers what a human looks like. That was nice, because if they knew, they might be scared of me. I wouldn’t have blamed them, either. 

“The brothers told me there was a way out for someone with a strong soul, so a human like me should have no trouble. They told me the way, and after a little while I went on. Snowdin was nice, and I liked Sans and Papyrus, but… I still wanted to go home. I thought that if I stayed here forever, I would never forget what I’d done to Mama. I thought if I could leave and be surrounded by humans again… then I could forget. 

“I wanted to forget.

“Waterfall is a strange place. Stars in the ceiling and flowers that whisper. The flowers made me nervous.

“I was never sure, but I thought, sometimes, that I saw a flash of gold out of the corner of my eye, behind me, hiding behind trees or clumps of reeds. I remembered what Flowey said and worried that he was following me. 

“Now I know. He was.

“I met more people in Waterfall. Fishy people, mostly, but other kinds, too. Sans was there, keeping a socket out for me like he said he would. I wanted to tell him about the flower that was maybe following me, but it seemed silly, even in a land of monsters, and I wasn’t sure Flowey was following anyway. 

“After Snowdin, Waterfall seemed really nice. Warmer, anyway.

“The whispers there… at first they creeped me out. It was like there were people around me all the time, when mostly I was alone. But then I started to listen to what the flowers said. They were wishes that people have made on the ceiling stars. And most of them were the same. To leave the underground, to see real stars, to see the sky, feel the wind… to not be so scared any more. I don’t think I realized until then that everyone I had met was probably more scared than I was. That they all wanted to leave even more than me. I knew that they did, but… it wasn’t until then, surrounded by so many wishes all at once, that I realized _how much._

“I met your Royal Guard Captain in Waterfall. Undyne. She… is a good Captain. She knew I was human right away, and she wasn’t afraid of me. She’s probably never afraid of anything.

“And she was set on capturing me for you, to use my soul to break the barrier and free everyone. She was after me, but you can’t help but think of her as a hero, can you? She lives in Waterfall with all those whispers around her all the time. I guess it makes sense she would be so dedicated. She wants to make all those wishes come true.

“She tracked me through Waterfall. Almost caught me a few times, but I always got away. Until the last time. She finally found me, cornered me so I would have to fight.

“Undyne was so strong, and so _angry._ I’m so much smaller than she is, but she didn’t hold back at all.

“She terrified me, really. I’d gotten into fights with other monsters along the way, and never hurt any of them, but none of them had been so _focused_ on killing me. They just fought because… well, something to do, I guess. This was the first time I really had anyone who was _really_ trying to capture me. Or kill me.

“What are you supposed to do when you come up against that kind of will? The only way to survive was to fight back… and I didn’t want to die yet.

“… She died, too. I killed her. I knew this time how easily monsters could die, and I tried so hard not to hurt her too badly. I thought if I just hurt her _enough,_ she would stop.

“But no. She was a true warrior, and fought to her very last HP.

“You would have been proud of her.

“…

“Hotland wasn’t too far away after that. I walked the rest of the way there, but then, I wasn’t so sure if I wanted to leave anymore. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do anything anymore. I’d killed two people, and I was starting to feel sick. Starting to wonder if I _deserved_ to go home. Papyrus called me not too long after I reached Hotland, and told me we should hang out with Undyne. They were good friends, the two of them, and since Papyrus and I were friends now, he wanted Undyne and I to be friends, too.

“I didn’t tell him. I didn’t have the courage to tell him that I’d killed Undyne. That her dust was still on my clothes.

“I met Dr. Alphys in her lab. She’s a little weird, but really nice. She told me that she was the Royal Scientist and that… she had been watching me since I left the Ruins. I thought that would mean she had seen me kill Undyne, and that she would be angry and would kill me back… But she missed that part. She hadn’t seen me kill anyone. She thought I was a good person, and wanted to help me. I think, if she had known what I’d done, she wouldn’t have been so eager to help me out.

“She told me about Mettaton, how she had created him to be an entertainer for the Underground and then added anti-human elements to him. And then, when she saw how… how nice I was, decided those needed to be removed, and accidentally turned him into ‘an unstoppable killing machine with a thirst for human blood.’

“I don’t know what I was expecting when Dr. Alphys told me about a killer robot, but Mettaton was not it. A box with arms and an attitude, going out of his way to be as obnoxiously charming as possible. It didn’t even matter that he was trying to kill me with a quiz show as soon as we met, I liked him. And I liked Dr. Alphys, too, even with how weird and awkward she was. She helped me out with Mattaton’s questions and puzzles, upgraded my phone, and said she would watch out for me, just like Sans had.

“I’d made another friend, when I was starting to doubt I should have any friends at all.

“Hotland seemed to have more puzzles than other places. Probably because of how close it is to the Core. Dr. Alphys helped me, I saw Sans once or twice, I ‘fought’ Mettaton a few times with silly things like cooking shows, news broadcasts, even a stage musical. I really had no idea how to react to a robot box in a frilly dress singing at me. When he made me fall through the stage, it hardly surprised me more than I already was. I even fought a bunch of spiders and their… Queen, I guess? That was a hard fight. I think the only reason I survived it was because I bought a doughnut in the Ruins. It was bizarre. 

“Hotland… was mostly a blur. I was so tired, and I couldn’t forget the two people I’d killed. I kept going because… well, what else was I going to do? It really was hot, and I had no idea what else I could do, so I just kept going forward.

“It only seemed to get clearer when I got to the MTT Hotel. Sans was there. He pulled me aside, off my path, to have something to eat.

“He asked me if it was really worth going home when I already had everything I needed right here. Food, friends… He didn’t know what I’d done. Why I had to leave. 

“Then he told me about his time as a sentry in Snowdin. How boring it was, and how one day he found a door in the woods and decided to use it to practice knock-knock jokes. How one day, a voice from the other side actually responded, and they began to trade jokes through the door. They became friends like that, even though neither one knew the others’ name. They way he talked about her… I could tell that Sans really liked this woman and her terrible taste in jokes.

“I already knew who he was talking about before he told me about the promise she had him make, to protect any human that might come _through_ the door. He’d found the door _I_ would come through, and he had been talking to Mama.

“Mama had a stranger promise to protect me, and I killed her. Sans protected me, even though I killed his friend - and he didn’t even know she was dead. Papyrus and Dr. Alphys, they both loved Undyne, and I’d killed her, too.

“Sans made it sound like he didn’t want me to leave, but what he said only made me more determined. I couldn’t stay with these people when I had taken away such precious things from them.

“I had to get out.

“So I went on, into the Core. The puzzles grew more dangerous, the monsters blocking my path more serious, but I had my determination back again. Nothing could stop me or keep me from the exit.

“Dr. Alphys became less and less able to help me as puzzles failed to behave the way she thought they would, as traps became harder to hack - or so I thought.

“I met Mettaton again, but he was different. Less silly and more angry. He told me that Dr. Alphys had been lying to me all this time, that she and Mettaton had been working together to make her look like a hero. He said he’d been willing to play along, but now he was tired of the charade, that he would kill me for real, take my soul, and go to the surface himself. 

“The fight with Mettaton was definitely one of the… strangest I’d ever fought. And when it was done, I was really worried that I had killed him, too, since his arms and legs had come off. But he was a robot… he was fine.

“The way was clear to the castle, so I went. I knew that I had to go there - here - and face you, Your Majesty, before I could try to break through the barrier. My determination was high, so I went.

“Dr. Alphys stopped me before I could leave. She told me… what it really takes to break through the barrier. Seven human souls. Or, if I wanted to just escape by myself, one monster soul and one human soul. She told me that you already had six souls, and only needed mine to break the barrier so everyone could go free. Or I could kill you, take your soul and escape to the surface. It was my choice to make.

“Your Majesty, I don’t mind telling you that I really did think very seriously about those options. I wanted to leave, to escape my guilt of what I had done down here… but if I did that, then I would only have more guilt for having abandoned all of my friends down here. The thought of doing something, anything, that would let them go free, it filled me with such hope. I could save everyone. All I had to do was die.

“Now, King Asgore, you may look at me strangely for this part. But please remember your promise: Let me finish my story.

“I walked through the city, through the castle. I came to a long hall where I met an old friend. I didn’t expect him, but maybe I should have. He asked me if all the things I had done to get this far had really been worth it. They told me about LV, the truth about LOVE and EXP, what it does to people who possess it. Because of my actions, I possessed some. He knew that. Somehow he could tell exactly how much EXP I had gained. 

“I thought I was the only one who knew the terrible things I had done. But he knew. And I don’t think he hated me. He was still my friend.

“…

“I went on. I came to a comfy little house surrounded by golden flowers. I read the notes left around and followed the path to the throne room, also gilded in gold flowers. I found the King, the one I was told I would have to kill, or allow to kill me, watering his garden. 

“He saw me, and he looked… sad. Tired. Resigned. He told me what a nice day it was, how it was a perfect day for a game of catch. But his pretend cheer didn’t last very long. He knew why I was there, knew what had to happen next. It had happened six times before, and I don’t think it got any easier with each time. It probably only got harder. Looking at his sad, kind face, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. I tried to imagine killing him, and felt sick. 

“The King told me to follow him when I was ready, and led me to the barrier. He gave me every opportunity to get away, telling me if I had anyone I wanted to see before… _before,_ then he would wait for my return. I think he was putting off the fight as much for his own sake as for mine. But I didn’t go. I wanted to see all my friends again. The thought of leaving them all made my chest ache, but then, the idea of leaving them _again_ was worse. I stayed. 

“The sad King… He said it was nice to have met me, and said goodbye.

“He was the strongest monster I had ever fought, and I had already fought many. He took away my option for MERCY, so I had no option but to try and talk to him or FIGHT. And I still didn’t know if I wanted to go home or die and let everyone go free. 

“I told him, over and over again, that I didn’t want to FIGHT, and while I know he heard me, he never stopped. It was hard to dodge his attacks, to stay alive long enough to decide if I _should_ stay alive.

“I tried to think of what I really wanted. I wanted to leave the underground, to get away from my guilt. But I wanted my friends to go free as well. I didn’t want you all to stay trapped while I walked under the sun. I wanted… I wanted to escape… with everyone. I wanted my friends to be with me under the sun. Even if none of them could forgive me for what I had done.

“Then I remembered the long hall, and the friend I had seen there. _He_ had known, somehow, what I had done. The people I had killed. I had washed my hands, but he could see the dust under my nails. And he… forgave me. I couldn’t understand why, but he did. 

“If he could forgive, then could everyone else?

“It was then that I really began to fight back, that I fought knowing that I wanted to win. Not to kill the King - I watched his HP very carefully. I thought if I lowered him far enough, then he would listen to me. We could find some other way to get through the barrier. All of us, together.

“I fought, dodged, and took the King down to a single HP. It wasn’t easy, and I was pretty banged up, too. But it worked. Instead of killing the King, I was able to show him MERCY, and that got his attention. 

“He looked so happy, kind of relieved, that someone like him, who had killed innocents to further his own cause, could be shown MERCY by one of his intended victims. I knew what he had done before that moment, but just then, I felt like we understood each other. We had both done horrible things, we were both surprised that anyone could show us forgiveness. 

“When I showed him MERCY, the King told me that I could stay with him, that he would care for and protect me. It wasn’t exactly what I wanted, but it was a start. I was ready to accept his offer, when…

“The King died.

“ _I_ didn’t do it. It was Flowey! He’d been following me that whole time, waiting for his moment. He’d waited until I had beaten the King to within an inch of his life, and then finished him off. He said it was a good thing I had done such a number on the old fool, or he never would have been able to do it. And since the King was now dead, he was free to steal the six human souls and absorb them into himself. Flowey wanted to become a god, and with six souls he nearly was. He just needed one more. 

“Mine.

“I don’t know, Your Majesty, if you’re familiar with the peculiar… magic, I suppose, of SAVE and LOAD? It’s a magic which I have had access to since my fall. It makes it so if I… if I die, I can LOAD, and return in time to a place before I was in danger. On that journey I used it a lot. The Underground is a dangerous place when you’re a human and you carry the key to everyone’s salvation. 

“I used it more in that battle with Flowey than in the rest of my entire time in the Underground. 

“I died so make times. Flowey said he wanted my soul, but he never took it. He just kept killing me. Most don’t notice when I LOAD. They don’t remember. Flowey knew, he remembered. He manipulated it so I couldn’t return to a safe place, but was stuck with him. He said he wanted to become a god, but his sadism kept me close, where he could kill me over and over and over. 

“I didn’t give up. I had my DETERMINATION and I fought no matter how hopeless it looked. I died _so_ many times, and it seemed so hopeless.

“Until, somehow, I began to reach out to those other souls. The ones Flowey had… eaten. They were still in there, struggling. They still had their DETERMINATION too, and they started to help me.

“It took a long time, but working together we were finally able to beat Flowey. The souls rebelled, and we were able to take away his power and beat him down. 

“When it was all over, I could have killed Flowey. He even said that I should. He was beaten and weak, but that wouldn’t last forever. I was stronger than he was, but that would change. He even told me he had learned nothing from having been beaten, that he would come back, kill me, kill _everyone_ and take away our ‘happy ending.’ I didn’t think with Mama, Undyne and then the King all dead, that the ending was very happy, and after experiencing some of what Flowey was capable of doing, and seeing the _joy_ he took in it…

“I was tempted.

“Flowey was the first one I ever really felt tempted to kill, who I thought might actually _deserve_ to die. But he was so pathetic. So broken. He was awful, worse than…

“I wasn’t sure that he deserved MERCY. But I couldn’t bring myself to kill him. I spared him, no matter what he said to try and goad me into killing him. 

“He… was confused. He couldn’t understand why I was being so nice to him. Called me an idiot. I probably was. Then… he told me something strange. He told me about a power, like SAVE and LOAD, but more powerful. RESET. It could turn back time, past the point of my last SAVE, to the point when I first fell and became a part of the Underground. To the point when I first gained these magics.

“If I RESET, then everything would go back to the way it had been back then. Everything I had done would be undone, all my friends would forget me… all the people who had died would live again. 

“He said that if I was so set on MERCY, on sparing even someone like him, than I should try and spare everyone. He wanted to see if it was possible to get through without killing anyone, if he was wrong about it being ‘kill or be killed.’ He challenged me to RESET and do it all again, and this time to not kill a single soul.

“I almost didn’t believe him, thought it might be some cruel sort of trick, to give me that kind of hope and then find out it was a lie. 

“But it wasn’t a lie. The RESET power was real, and I could turn it all back again. I would remember what had once been done, and so would Flowey, but no one else. I could do it all again, and this time… no one had to get hurt. I could save everyone. 

“I used the RESET power. It was strange. Like falling, but falling in every direction at once and never landing. Until I did. Suddenly. It knocked the wind out of me.

“When I woke up, I was surrounded by golden flowers.”

* * *

The child stopped speaking very abruptly, their gaze dropping down to their teacup. After a moment they took a long sip of the remaining liquid. 

Asgore could hardly blame them for the sudden interruption. They had been talking steadily for nearly an hour. He could hear the strain in their voice. As they swallowed, they grimaced, but didn’t stop drinking. It occurred to him that the tea would have gone cold long ago. 

Without saying a word, he held up the teapot - still having to pinch the handle between forefinger and thumb - whose soft, striped cozy ought to have helped to keep its contents warm. Also without speaking, the child - Frisk - nodded and held out their cup. The tea steamed as it poured.

It was such a normal scene they shared. Deceptively so. Asgore was well aware that the reason he held his tongue now was because he had no idea what to say. What _could_ he say?

Several times throughout Frisk’s tale he’d had to remind himself of his promise: don’t interrupt, listen to every word. Really _listen._

It hadn’t been so bad at first. The mention of a talking flower had piqued his curiosity, but caused no alarm. Frisk’s description of their battle with ‘Mama’ and its outcome had made his heart ache… and made him wonder. The odds against the only semi-formed, panicked thought flitting through his mind were actually quite high, but still, he had to wonder. 

The Ruins, ‘Home,’ and the woman Frisk described, the way she behaved, taking in a strange fallen human like they were her own… it _sounded_ like her.

It wasn’t until they reached the point in their tale of the second death, Undyne, that Asgore really began to question the truthfulness of what he was being told.

There was no reason to mistrust them at the outset, and Asgore was not one who was given much to thinking of children as liars. He knew, intellectually, that this child would have a good reason to lie if anyone did. It might be their idea to weave some tale as some way to convince him to let them go. It might be a convoluted bid for pity and MERCY. Were that the case, it was a wasted effort. If they wanted to escape him, all they had to do was turn back. He would not pursue them. 

And if their goal were to evoke pity so he would allow them to pass through the barrier and escape the Underground, why tell this tale? One where they were fit into the role of accidental murderer? Especially when it was that detail which told him what they said could not be true. 

Undyne was not dead. If she were, Asgore would know. That was not a romantic statement, merely a factual one. Had his Captain of the Royal Guard fallen in battle, he would have been informed. He would have known of Undyne’s passing within an hour of it happening. And even were that not true… he had heard from Undyne after the time Frisk claimed to have slain her. He had received a message telling him the child had made it to Hotland and was still on their way. Frisk claimed to have battled and killed Undyne in Waterfall.

What was the reason for this deception?

Still, he’d listened to what the child had to say. He had promised, and even knowing that what they said was at the very least a partial fabrication, he couldn’t forget the look, the pleading, aged look that had been in this child’s eye. He knew he was being lied to, and yet he couldn’t help but believe what he was being told.

He listened as they described their meeting with Dr. Alphys in Hotland, glad to hear that she still seemed to be keeping busy, whatever the source of information. His poor Royal Scientist still refused to answer his calls for some reason. He listened with interest to the description of Mettaton, the Underground’s only celebrity. Asgore didn’t watch television, really, and thought perhaps he might have been missing out all this time. 

He listened carefully as they described their last dinner with Sans the skeleton, and how he had tried to convince them not to leave. More than anything, he heard the way their voice trembled, the guilt and pain speaking more articulately than the words themselves. 

He listened to their adventures through the Core, Dr. Alphys’ betrayal, and Mettaton’s betrayal of Dr. Alphys. Their fight with the robot, and their final approach to the castle and New Home. 

Asgore expected the tale to wrap up, for some final point to be made. He did not expect what he was given. And it was then, as the child told him things that had happened between themselves and _him,_ that he began to wonder if the child wasn’t lying… but if they were insane. 

If it was a bid for pity, it was an extremely clever one, and one which might work - to make him think that they were mad. 

But details, details belied their tale being either falsehood or ravings. Their description of his own behavior, allowing them to go if they wished to say goodbye to their friends, he knew full well he would have done just that. It was not a courtesy many, expecting what they would find here, would dream up. It wasn’t terribly realistic, but it was what Asgore would do. 

Then the battle with the flower, Flowey, and the souls… Certain details in this part of their tale also made him pause. SAVE and LOAD… were those powers he had heard of before? They sounded familiar, but in the same way as a far off memory or a forgotten dream. The words stirred familiarity, but he could not recall where he had heard it from or in what context. But it _had_ been a long time ago… Was it before Tori had left him? Who had talked to him about it? He wanted to say it was one of his scientists, but he knew it could not have been Dr. Alphys.

He felt he ought to know something of the flower in much the same way. Vague memories he could not place in time, that he wasn’t even sure were real memories, but which might be memories of dreams. A golden flower given life and a voice… Why did that feel so familiar?

And the RESET power. What a powerful tool that could be. With the ability to set everything back to a certain point and undo past mistakes…

What a terrifying, tempting power that could be.

But was any of it true?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next part will be up next Saturday. Thanks for reading, everyone!
> 
> [You can follow me on tumblr here!](http://ehtarwrites.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

By the time Frisk had finished their tea, Asgore was still uncertain of what to say, or how to respond to the extraordinary tale he had just been told. And from the sound of things, they were far from the end of their story. This was merely a pause between chapters. 

“It is a very… interesting story you tell, Frisk.” He winced a little at the tone of his own words, how patronizing they sounded.

Frisk, however, didn’t seem to mind. A smile came to their lips - a knowing, weary smile. “But you’re not sure how much of it you can believe. If any of it.”

Asgore returned the smile, caught flatfooted in the face of the child’s blunt honesty. “To be truthful. It is a rather… unique story. Fantastic, one might even say. ‘A little hard to believe’ is probably an understatement.”

“I’m sorry, then,” Frisk said, setting down their cup. “Because there is more, and it will only become less believable as we go.”

The king nodded, his eyes straying to the bowl of golden flowers that had been sitting on the table, and which the child had moved before sitting down. After hearing as much of their tale as he had, it was no longer a mystery why they would want some distance from them. He shook his shoulders, armor plates rattling. “Would you care for… should I make us some more tea? Or cookies?”

“No. Thank you, Your Majesty.”

“Then please continue. What happened next?”

Frisk sighed, and picked up the threads of their tale.

* * *

“I woke up, and I was surrounded by golden flowers,” Frisk began, their eyes going off to a corner, staring into the middle distance as they saw in their mind’s eye what they were describing. “At first I thought… I don’t know. That I was dreaming, maybe? Or that I’d gone mad. I’d died and come back before, but that almost seemed normal compared to… I mean, it only ever really affected _me,_ giving me a second chance. RESET was meant to give _everyone_ a second chance, even the ones who had been killed. It seemed too good to be true. Too good a thing to exist. Too good a thing for me to have.”

“I got up, and I was… back in the Ruins. The sky where I had fallen from was far overhead, the darkness pressing close… It was all as I remembered it. Even the smell of the flowers and wet stone. I was back.

“I wasn’t sure I really believed it yet, but I remember I started to shake with the possibility. I would get to see everyone - I would get to see Mama-! It terrified me. It made me happy, excited… and sick. I had no idea what to expect, and just like the first time I woke up in that place, I hesitated, frightened to leave and explore the Ruins. Only this time, it was because I thought I knew exactly what I was going to see.

“Eventually I did, of course. No story can continue if the characters refuse to move. No game can be played without some risk.

“I went into the next chamber, and there I found Flowey. I panicked a little, thinking he might try to kill me like he had the first time, like he had not long ago and succeeded so many times. But he just reminded me of why I had RESET: don’t kill anyone, and prove him wrong. He would be watching. He left right after that, right before… _she_ showed up.”

The child paused, and Asgore could see why. Though they still looked off to one side, he could see that their eyes were shining. He thought about getting tissues for them, but got the impression that they would prefer it if he pretended he couldn’t see the tears.

“It was true,” they went on after a few moments, their young voice trembling with emotion. “She was alive again, like nothing had happened. Exactly like nothing had happened. She didn’t remember me at all, but that was okay. That was better than…”

“I started crying right there, actually. Luckily, Mama thought it was just because I was scared, or missed my old home. She comforted me and started to lead me back to her house.

“It was strange to introduce myself all over again when I already knew her, to listen to her explanation of the Ruins and the Underground when I had seen so much of them. It was hard, actually, to pretend that everything was new to me. That would only get harder with each person I ‘met,’ but I didn’t know that yet.

“There was one time when Mama did scare me: when she remembered, or _felt_ that I preferred cinnamon to butterscotch. There was no way she would know that unless she remembered the time that had come before, and if she remembered _that,_ then what else would she remember?

“That was the only time she ever seemed to remember anything of her previous life. If she had any other little memories or feelings, she never mentioned them out loud.”

Asgore listened quietly as they continued to describe their second journey through the Ruins. It was almost exactly the same as the first, save for an occasional expression of awe at just _how_ exact it was, their wonder and gratitude for this second chance. It seemed to be something that they needed to express, and he didn’t interrupt. 

He did wonder, once again, at the identity of ‘Mama.’ He was almost certain that it was Toriel, his estranged wife who Frisk was describing, and that they knew that’s who she was. Why else would they be so careful not to mention her name to him? They knew who Toriel was to him, knew how he would respond to hearing of her death, even if it were an accident.

Strangely enough, that all lent credence to their tale being true, including the RESET power. And if it were all true… then Toriel was still alive. Alive again. Asgore breathed deep, a tightness in his chest loosening.

“When I had to fight Mama again… I almost didn’t. I almost decided it was a better idea just to stay with her, the way she wanted. It wouldn’t be so bad, really, so long as everyone was safe. But then, everyone would still be trapped, and I couldn’t let that happen, either. And besides… if I stayed, I didn’t know what Flowey might do to get me moving again. 

“It wasn’t so hard, the second time. The fight itself, I mean. Trying to fight while remembering that I had killed Mama once already, that was hard. But I had fought much harder fights since the last time I had seen Mama, and I remembered her style. I could dodge much better, and kept telling her I didn’t want to fight, and spared her every chance I got. Eventually, she wasn’t trying to hurt me anymore. In fact, she was avoiding it.

“Finally, she let me go! I was so relieved, I almost fainted. I didn’t even notice most of my injuries until I made it outside. I’d been so focused on making sure Mama didn’t get hurt that I didn’t keep track of what happened to me.

“Before I left, Mama warned me again of how dangerous it was, how there would be those who would want to kill me. I knew she was right. I’d gone through it all once already. But I also knew that the greatest threat in the Underground was me.

“I went out so much happier than I had been the first time. I remember it didn’t look so bleak, then. More like a fairyland, all covered in white. I practically ran out into the snow, I was so happy, and excited to ‘meet’ Sans and Papyrus. In fact, I got a little too excited, and I did some things that…”

Frisk trailed off, their expression clouding in a frown. Rather than stare to a far off wall, their gaze fell down to their toes. Asgore wondered, but held his tongue, allowing the child to continue when they were ready.

“I knew better than to say things that I shouldn’t know,” they said eventually, speaking slowly, as though it were a difficult subject. “I knew better than to ask questions to things I shouldn’t know about as well. It was the little things that had nothing to do with talking I kept forgetting. _Acting_ like I knew what was going to happen before it did. I did know, but I shouldn’t have acted like it.”

“It was really small stuff. Turning around too soon, solving a puzzle too quickly, just not being as scared of a land of monsters as someone my size ought to have been. It’s not as bad as going up to someone and just telling them that you know their secrets, but it’s the kind of thing that can get you noticed. 

“It got me noticed. _He_ noticed. I didn’t think he would have, but I should have seen that coming. I’d lived through everything once, and just assumed I knew everything. I was wrong. I still knew nothing. Nothing at all.”

They paused again, as they seemed to get lost in thought. More than ever Asgore wished to know what it was the child meant, and again he restrained himself from asking. From the sound of things, their tale was far from finished, and no doubt anything of real import would eventually be revealed. He just had to have patience.

When the child continued their tale, it was a very familiar one. Almost nothing changed between the first time experiencing events and the second. Occasionally Frisk would make some mention of doing something which caught someone’s attention - ‘His,’ always with that particular emphasis - or of deliberately doing something a little different, now that they ‘knew better,’ to make things better for others. Always to make things better for others. 

Asgore couldn’t help the thought that, in reality, it was all as much for themself as it was for anyone else. A way to salve the guilt, to repay a debt that there was no way to repay, and which, in their case, no longer existed. The only wounds remaining from their actions were the ones they carried with themself. 

Asogre wondered if that was a sort of justice.

They went on, through puzzles and battles, on and on until they came to Waterfall, to the place where they had to confront Undyne.

“I tried to avoid her entirely,” the child confided. “But I couldn’t seem to. There were only so many paths I could take, and she was watching for me. The place I had fought her before, actually, there was only one pathway through, and she was blocking it. And she wasn’t moving, either. She _knew_ I only had one way through and she wasn’t about to let me sneak past her.”

“I had to fight her again, and I still wasn’t sure how I was going to manage to do it and not kill her. Or get killed. My only real hope was that I was a better fighter, now. I might find some way once I was in the fight again, some way I had missed before.”

Frisk smiled to themself. “I’d forgotten, somehow, what a good fighter Undyne was. I was better than I had been, but her and her green magic… She kicked my butt a good few times. Nothing I tried worked. Not talking, not sparing, not asking for MERCY… I even tried fighting her for real for a while, to see if she would give up once she saw that I _could_ beat her, but didn’t want to. But no. She’s determined. The most determined monster I’ve ever met.”

“Finally, when every other option had been exhausted, I tried something I should have thought of ages ago: I ran away.

“I didn’t think it would actually work! I was sure that she would instantly catch me, but that armor she wears slows her down. The green magic she uses balances that out really well. I would never have noticed. Not that her armor makes her slow. I ran, and she chased. She chased me all the way to Hotland, screaming at me the whole time. She even caught up with me a few times, but I kept slipping away.

“We ran all the way to Hotland and the heat started to get to her. The armor again. There are Royal Guards who wear armor in Hotland, but they must be more used to it. Undyne is a fishy monster, so I guess it makes sense she would have trouble. 

“Not long after we got to Hotland she collapsed. Luckily there was water nearby, and I splashed her with a cupful. I’d worked so hard to make sure she survived, I wasn’t going to let her just bake!

“She came to after a little water, and saw me. I thought for sure she would start chasing me down again and got ready to run, though I wasn’t sure how far I would get before _I_ collapsed, too. I’m not a fish, but running in Hotland isn’t much fun for humans, either. 

“But she didn’t chase again. She scowled at me, looked like she still _really_ wanted to kill me… and then she left. Backed off and went home.

“I was so relieved,” Frisk said with a sigh, and Asgore could see the remembered emotion reflected in their face. “Not just because Undyne let me go, but _she_ was alive. My two greatest challenges were done, I thought. The two people I had hurt before were safe. So long as I didn’t make any fresh mistakes, everything ought to be fine.”

Their face clouded over again, and they stared into their empty teacup. Their fingers fidgeted along the rim, with the handle, but Asgore didn’t ask if they wanted more tea. Something was happening behind their eyes, and all he could do was wait. 

When the story picked up again, Frisk sounded more distracted than they had before, less invested in what they were currently saying, and more like they wanted to move along to what came next. They went on through Hotland, the meeting with Dr. Alphys and Mettaton, their various adventures, puzzles and battles, everything staying relatively the same all the way until their meeting with him. 

Asgore wasn’t certain whether he had expected this to lead to where they were now, sitting in his living room and drinking tea or not. But he wasn’t overly surprised when it became obvious it was not. The Asgore they spoke to led them to the Barrier, gently and apologetically, just as the first had done and. It was still an unsettling thing to hear second hand actions that he had taken, when he had in fact not taken them yet, but he knew with one hundred percent certainty that he would have, just as Frisk described.

“We got to the Barrier, and again you offered to let me go and… say my goodbyes. I almost refused, I just wanted to get it all over and done with, though I was still a little fuzzy on how to get you to listen to me without weakening you so much that Flowey could kill you. I remembered, and still thought Flowey capable of doing just as he had before. 

“But I remembered something else. A phone call from Papyrus that I had been too distracted to really listen to at the time. He’d said that we ought to hang out with Undyne sometime, that he thought we would make great friends. 

“I wasn’t too sure about that, but I wanted to go. I’d made friends with everyone else, it didn’t seem right to just skip over Undyne. She was scary, but I wanted to be friends with her, too.

“So I told you I wanted to say some goodbyes and walked all the way back to Waterfall.

“When I got to Undyne’s house, Papyrus was actually already there waiting for me. It made me feel a little guilty, really, because how long had he been standing there? He didn’t seem to mind, though, and was happy to see me. He handed me a bone to give Undyne as a present, and knocked on the door.

“Undyne was expecting him for training. She wasn’t expecting me at all. The look she gave me, I thought for sure she would throw a spear at me, or at the very least slam the door in our faces. But she didn’t - only because Papyrus was there, I’m sure. She invited us in, and Papyrus was so excited he didn’t even notice the tone of voice she used to do it. He was so happy to have his two friends become friends with each other, he actually jumped out a window so we would be alone and interact with each other. 

“I thought for sure Papyrus was going to get me killed. He means well - he _always_ means well, but… I was nervous about being left alone with Undyne.

“It was… pretty okay, though. With a little prodding from Papyrus through the window, Undyne took up the, ah, ‘challenge’ of becoming my friend. She wanted to be my bestest friend ever just to show that she could.”

Frisk paused, and Asgore was surprised to see a wide grin spread across their face. Even more surprising, they lifted their eyes to look directly at him. Throughout this entire tale, eye contact had been minimal at best, but now they looked at him with a wide smile and shining eyes. He couldn’t help but reflect that smile back. It was good to know that they were still capable of it. 

“Undyne was a lot of fun. Very intense, but a lot of fun. I could see why she and Papyrus were such good friends, and was a little surprised about how protective she was of him. His training with her is how to cook, not how to fight - and after seeing her cook, Papyrus’ spaghetti makes a lot more sense.

“She talked a lot. She talked about Papyrus and how she became a member of the Royal Guard. She talked about you, too, and said that I reminded her of you.”

The grin slowly faded, leaving an expression that was difficult to read but which he was not certain he liked at all. 

“I can see why, now,” they said. “But not in the way she meant.”

“Anyway. She tried to ‘train’ me how to cook as a way to become better friends, but we kind of ended up setting her house on fire instead. Undyne decided it was all a lost cause and started another fight, but I only faked hitting her. She thought it was a real hit, and it was so pathetic that she decided I couldn’t possibly be a danger to anyone. Somehow, we really did become friends.

“With her house on fire, she went to live with Sans and Papyrus in Snowdin. I went to see them there, and they looked happy enough. I’m not sure how much Sans enjoyed having that much energy in the house, but I didn’t see him then.

“While I was there, Undyne gave me a letter to deliver to Dr. Alphys.

“I could have refused, I guess, but by then, I really didn’t want to come back here. I didn’t know for sure how things would end, so I put off the end for as long as I could. 

“I brought the letter to the lab, but Dr. Alphys wouldn’t let me in. I slipped the letter under the door, and actually got to listen while the doc read the letter! Turned out it was a love letter, and I really shouldn’t have been listening in at all. When she finished reading she opened the door and found me. I was so embarrassed to be caught eavesdropping, but Dr. Alphys wasn’t upset about that. She thought the letter was from me! Undyne hadn’t signed it and Alphys thought I was the one in love with her since I was the one who delivered the letter!

“We ended up going on a date. I-- She had jumped to so many conclusions all at once that I couldn’t really correct her. It was embarrassing, and she looked even more embarrassed, so… I just went with it. 

“The date didn’t go very well, anyway. She was dressed all nice and everything, but it was pretty obvious that all of the dating preparations she had ever made were for someone else, and someone pretty specific. Undyne.

“That… was pretty cool,” the child said with a grin. “They were both crushing on each other, and just now getting up the courage to say anything. It was so cool. I just kinda… got in the way for a minute. 

“We were both startled when Undyne actually came walking through the garbage dump where we’d come for our date. Dr. Alphys hid behind a pile and watched as Undyne asked if I’d seen her anywhere. She was dressed nice, too, and I felt more in the way than ever. I told her I hadn’t seen her - I didn’t know what else to say! - and she went on to look for Dr. Alphys. When she left the doc came out and confessed that she really had a crush on Undyne. When she did that, I finally felt like I could tell the truth, too, so I did. 

“Poor Dr. Alphys was so embarrassed, and so certain that she would mess up any chance she had with Undyne, that I offered to role play with her a little. I hoped that if I played Undyne and she could practice what she would say, she would have more confidence. She agreed, and it was going pretty well. Until Undyne came back and overheard us.

“I don’t know if it was the role play that gave her the courage, but Alphys starting confessing all of her lies to Undyne right there and then. Undyne looked a little shocked, but said she didn’t care so long as Alphys had passion for the things that she loved and believed in. She said all Alphys needed was training, and she could be just as strong willed as her.

“Alphys got all excited, thinking that Undyne would be the one training her. She was really disappointed when she found out it was going to be Papyrus training her.”

Frisk actually chuckled at the memory, and Asgore smiled along. He didn’t think he had ever met Papyrus, and rather thought he would remember him if he had, but just working from Frisk’s description of him he could imagine how well his training would mesh with Dr. Alphys’ personality. Dr. Alphys, while brilliant, was extremely shy and retiring. In fact he had been rather surprised that she had been interacting with the human at all, her sworn duty or not, given that she had ceased to even answer his phone calls. 

It was good to hear that she was alright, and very possibly beginning a romance with his Guard Captain. 

“I started making my way back. There didn’t seem to be much else to do, and I couldn’t put it off forever, so I started making my way back here.

“I didn’t get very far before Papyrus rang me up. He told me Dr. Alphys skipped out early on her training, _really_ early, and he was worried about her. It seemed to me that it would take a lot to make someone like Papyrus actually worry, so I got worried, too. I wasn’t too far from her lab, so I went to check on her.”

The child hesitated a moment, clearing their throat. No doubt it was dry after so much talking. Unsolicited, he rose to get his guest a glass of water. 

They thanked him and drank half the glass without pausing for breath.

“Sorry,” they said, wiping at their chin and leaving a clean patch. “Thirstier than I thought, I guess.” They paused a moment, breathing and staring into their glass, before making rare eye contact. 

“Your Majesty, I’m about to tell you some things about your Royal Scientist that you don’t know. A lot of it will be upsetting, and normally I wouldn’t tell these kinds of things to anyone, because they’re not my secrets to tell. But I know… I know that Dr. Alphys intends to tell you these things anyway, and this story needs to be told whole or not at all.”

Asgore blinked, once again caught off guard. What was there they could tell him about Dr. Alphys that would warrant such an introduction as that?

As he listened, he soon found out. 

Frisk told him how they returned to the lab to find it apparently deserted, only a note left by the doctor saying that she might not return. The child admitted to some alarm at the cryptic message, and followed her into a place they called the ‘True Lab.’

The child, as they described their descent and exploration of the place, was obviously shaken by its discovery. They had been under the impression that what they had seen aboveground was all there was to the laboratories, with no inkling of what lay beneath them. Asgore found it a little odd, considering where they were and all they had been through, that they wouldn’t consider at all times the possibility of a world under their feet. 

Asgore, of course, was not startled by the revelation of the lab’s lower sections. They were his labs, after all, and he had visited them many times, though not recently. Of more interest to him was the condition of the labs when Frisk entered them, and the log entries they found. They told him more about what had been going on down there than the doctor herself had in quite some time. So did the… creatures… they found. 

“They weren’t like anything I had ever seen before, above or below ground,” the child recalled with a shudder. “All white and… gooey. Dripping and melted like… like something left in an oven too long that wasn’t even meant to be cooked. Except these were alive, moving around, trying to talk to me. Some monsters had startled me or even scared me before, but no one had ever horrified me the way these did. In some ways they were even worse than Flowey when he had the human souls. Flowey was a monstrosity, a nightmare bent on killing me, but these… these were _sad._ ”

“I actually had to remind myself, more than once, not to kill. It… it almost seemed like killing these creatures would have been an act of MERCY. But I didn’t. I kept true to my path and got through everything without actually harming a single one.”

Frisk’s adventures in the labs went on, and Asgore slowly came to understand, through the logs, the final horror of Dr. Alphys’ experiments with DETERMINATION. What it was she had been hiding from him all this time. And the weight of the guilt she must have been bearing. 

A part of him felt nothing but horror at the ultimate results of what had appeared to be a very promising vein of experiments. Those poor people, _melded_ together like clay. And their families… It was no wonder at all the doctor was in hiding, when it was by her hand that it had all turned out this way. A part of him could only condemn Dr. Alphys for the results of the experiment. Surely there had to have been some hint what would happen? Had she been too slow to see it, or did she simply consider it worth the risk?

Another, much larger portion of him, felt only pity and compassion. No, if Dr. Alphys had any hint that this would be the result of her tests, she would not have continued. There were those of a logical, scientific turn of mind who could distance themselves from their work, push through whatever moral ambiguity existed for the sake of their theory. Dr. Alphys was not one of those. She was sharp of mind but soft of heart. Anything, _everything_ that has come about due to her actions, she will have felt deeply. Maybe too deeply. 

And she never reached out for help, thinking she had to face her mistakes completely on her own. 

Poor Dr. Alphys.

Asgore shook himself, deciding that it was more than time to take the doctor firmly in hand and have a good, thorough, and above all, _understanding_ conversation with her. 

He came out of his reverie in time to hear the child describe a room that seemed different from the rest. 

“… a big screen television, not a monitor, and with an old VCR connected to it. On the shelves either side of it there were stacks and stacks of video tapes, all neatly organized. I wanted to go through all of them, really, but there must have been days’ worth of video in there. Instead, I just took a quick look at the five sitting right next to the VCR.”

Frisk raised their eyes up to his once again, and again he was struck by their age. What could possibly have aged this child’s gaze so much?

“I never saw anything on those tapes,” they said quietly. “It was always too dark, or the lens cap was left on, or the camera tossed to a side and only filming the ground. But I heard what was going on. And what I heard… confused me. Disturbed me.”

“There were five tapes. On the first one I heard a man and a woman talking, joking and happy. The woman was happy about a new baby on the way, and was making terrible puns about being a new mom. The man, her husband, made a joke back, and she teased him by pretending to hate the joke. They sounded so happy and in love… I felt a little guilty for listening into their conversation like that. Like a spy.

“The next tape had different voices. Or one voice, really. Whoever else was speaking was too low to hear. It was a voice I had never heard before, but it was very young. It asked the second person to make a creepy face. Someone named ‘Chara.’ …I hadn’t met anyone by that name yet, but it sounded familiar to me.

“The third tape had the same young voice, talking to Chara. They talked about a mistake with baking. Buttercups instead of cups of butter, which led to someone getting really sick. Apparently Chara had laughed the incident off, while the kid I could hear had been really upset by it. They turned off the camera before I could hear any more, though it sounded like they were going to talk more about something important…

“The next tape… whatever they had talked about, whatever plan they had put together, the kid I could hear didn’t like it. He was crying though he tried to hide it. I could hear it in his voice. Chara convinced him anyway. They were planning to somehow free everyone from the Underground, to save all monsters. And to do that, they needed buttercups. The ones that had made ‘Dad’ so sick.

“The last tape… was awful. The voices from the first tape were back, only now they were frantic and horrified. They were trying to wake up Chara, saying that they were the future of humans and monsters, that they had to stay determined… after a while, when I thought there was nothing left on the tape, I heard the kid talk again. Whatever the plan was, he didn’t like it anymore, wanted to back out of it. But he convinced himself to stick to the plan. ‘Just six,’ is what he said. ‘We just need six souls, and we’ll do it together.’

“He sounded determined himself when he said that, but--“

Asgore stood abruptly, cutting off the child’s tale. They looked up at him, startled, but this time he was the one who couldn’t meet their eyes.

He couldn’t listen to any more. It was too much to hear all at once, too many memories and revelations all crashing together on him after all these years. Even secondhand, to hear of those intimate moments shared with Tori as they both reveled in the anticipation of finally, finally being parents was almost like being in that moment again. Life had been far from perfect, but those tender moments, they _had_ been perfect. 

And the children… he knew who the other was. Asriel, his son, and Chara, his adoptive human child. His children. Playing with a camera, with each other…

His heart ached and stung with old grief brought back to life so unexpectedly. Would it ever stop hurting?

But then, a plan? A plan made between them to go to the surface, take six souls and return? After Chara… died… he knew Asriel had taken their soul and made that attempt, but… it had been their plan to do that from the beginning? It seemed impossible. To do that would mean that they _planned_ for Chara to die so Asriel could take their soul. Impossible! And the plan had been Chara’s idea? They wouldn’t have offered to die, any more than Asriel would suggest they do so.

But… other memories came back to him. Of finding Chara unconscious, Asriel hovering close. The look of guilty panic in his eyes, the mounds of buttercups surrounding them… The golden stain on Chara’s lips…

Was any of it true?

Asgore forced himself to take a breath. He was angry, as he had been when he’d found Chara dying, as he had been later when he found Asriel, transformed and mortally wounded. The memories of his children dying brought all of the sadness and anger he had felt then. It was that anger and that sense of helplessness, of hopelessness, which had led to his declaring war on the humans. Those loveless beings that had banished them to a living tomb, who took his son from him, cut him down when he’d gone to them for MERCY.

Familiar rage tore at him, and as then he was tempted to turn it against the nearest target that presented itself. This time it would be Frisk, the one who dared to tell him these things. They were human, but he was a Boss. He believed he could win that fight. 

Grief and rage may have held him just as they had so many years ago, but the years between had also given him experience of what they would lead to if he allowed it. He breathed slowly, calming himself, not looking at the child beside him lest doing so break his resolve. 

When he felt more like himself again, Asgore sat down. He thought about pouring himself another cup of tea, but somehow he doubted it would have the same calming effect it normally had on him.

“I apologize, child,” he rumbled. “I found what you were saying upsetting, but I am calmer now. Please continue.”

Frisk eyed him warily. They did not seem particularly frightened of him, but neither were they totally at ease. It occurred to him that if they really had fought in the past, then the child would know exactly how much stronger they were than he was. By their own account, they had spent much of that battle trying their best to _not_ fight, while Asgore had felt no such restraint - and still the child had won. Knowing that, they probably knew that they had no reason to fear him. 

Asgore… was not certain how he felt about that. 

“What I have to say further on will be even more upsetting,” the child said, still watching him. “Are you sure you can handle it?”

He attempted a smile, knowing that it failed just from the feel of it. “I shall have to if I wish to hear how the story ends.”

Something flickered across the child’s face, there and gone before he could identify what it was. Their features quickly stilled into stoic determination and they nodded.

Frisk didn’t mention anything they found on those tapes again, but finished out what they had found in the lab. It was all more of the same until the doctor herself found Frisk in her labs. Asgore felt another momentary jolt of anger when he thought of the doctor. That she had found those tapes, watched them, and never told him about them! He was more disturbed by that conscious betrayal than he was by her accidental resurrection and mutation of citizens. 

Still, it was all too late to do anything about… anything, really. He breathed deep, and did his best to just let it go. 

“She seemed better after she told me everything she had done,” Frisk was saying, but it was without a smile. “She left with all of the amalgamates, and I went to leave, too. I don’t know where I was planning on going. I just wanted to leave. When I got to the elevator, I got a phone call. I didn’t recognize the number, and I didn’t recognize the voice on the other end.”

“The voice called me Chara. Said it had been a long time since we’d seen each other, and that we would again soon. And then the elevator went crazy.

“When it stopped, I was back in the castle. Somehow it had brought me all the way back, and as soon as I stepped out vines grew over the door so I couldn’t go back. I was trapped, with only one option left: go forward.

“I went, even though I knew it must be a trap. I had no idea who the voice could have been, or how whoever it was had done what they had with the elevator. I didn’t know what it was the voice wanted, or why it had called me Chara. I had only just heard that name for the first time, but again I thought… I recognized it from somewhere.

“I went on, dreading what was coming, even though I thought I knew what it was, because I wasn’t certain anymore. Something was different. Something had changed, and I didn’t know what it was.

“I came back to the place where you were waiting for me. Despite how much time had passed, I don’t think you had moved at all, and when I talked to you, you acted like it had only been a couple minutes. You still didn’t want to fight, and neither did I. But it was the only thing left to do. Even if I wanted to leave, I couldn’t anymore. I’d already tried.

“So we got ready to fight, and it was exactly the same as it had been before. You said your goodbyes to me, and I got ready for my option of MERCY to be taken away again. Except this time, something changed.

“Out of the dark familiar flames sprang up and attacked you! It was Mama! Somehow, for some reason, she’d followed me this time, and came to my rescue from the ‘despicable King Asgore.’ It was as much to save you as me, because she knew that I could win. She didn’t believe either of us should die, that we both deserved MERCY. Even though she was angry with you.”

The child’s voice trailed away, and they looked uncomfortable. He thought he could guess why, and let them work out how to tell him, or _if_ they would tell him this particular revelation.

“You two… knew each other. Very well. You were so happy to see her again, but she was _not_ happy to see you again. She just didn’t think you should die. Even when you asked if the two of you could just be friends, she said no. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so crushed.

“You see… uh… Mama’s name was- is… Toriel.”

Frisk glanced up at him almost furtively to see what his reaction to this reveal would be. Small wonder why, when they’d admitted to killing her once. Whatever the circumstances, it was reasonable to assume a person would be angry when hearing about the murder of a loved one. But he had long ago suspected that ‘Mama’ was indeed his estranged wife.

So when the child looked up at him, eyes darting over his face, trying to read his response, he just gave them a small smile and nodded. He knew, and it was alright.

Some of the tension in the child’s shoulders left, and they gave an inaudible sigh.

“Okay. Well, after Mama stopped the fight, more people kept showing up to do the same thing. Undyne, Dr. Alphys, Papyrus, Sans, all of them barged in to stop us from fighting each other. None of them wanted either of us to die, and they all came to stop us. It was strange to see everyone in one place like that. It was the first time it had happened, and it turned out that Sans and Mama actually knew each other, though that was the first time they had met face to face.

“They all banded together to stop the fight, saying I would have to stay Underground for now, but… I was just so happy to see everyone alive and well, and they all cared so much about me, that I didn’t mind not escaping. Not if escaping meant someone had to die. With all the friends I had made, I was perfectly happy to stay Underground for however long it took to break free. Or even if we never did, that might be okay, too. 

“…It wasn’t until the vines came crashing in that I remembered Flowey.

“He captured everyone, told us how while we were distracted he had stolen the souls again. I’d been tricked.

“The whole thing, RESETTing, ‘proving’ that I could go through everything without killing a single person, it was all so he could become the god he wanted to be. He couldn’t beat me, even with six human souls. But with six human souls and all of the monster souls I had spared… he could.

“You all tried to protect me from him. You used your magic, told me to believe… but he absorbed you all. And when he did… He wasn’t Flowey anymore. He wasn’t even the thing he had become the first time he had absorbed the human souls and killed me all those times. He looked… normal. Like a normal kid, a monster kid I recognized, even though I’d never seen him before.

“He said he’d been so tired of being a flower. Then he said hello to me, but he called me Chara, and said he was my best friend. Then he changed again, grew older, bigger, and even more familiar.

“He said his name was Asriel Dreemurr.”

Asgore’s resolve to remain calm broke. But he didn’t rise, he didn’t cry out in shock. He sat very, very still and tried to understand the impossible thing he had just been told.

Asriel… his _son_ … was a _flower?_ His son’s soul still existed somewhere, was still… cognizant? How, how was that possible? His son was long dead and dust, body and soul, his self spread in the same place his human child had been buried. How was it remotely possible that he could still exist in any form?

 _Could_ any of this be true? If it wasn’t, then to what purpose would Frisk weave such a complex web of lies, and how would they know so much? If it were true… then what did it _mean?_

“That fight… was unlike any other I had fought. In a way it wasn’t as difficult as the one I had fought against Flowey, but in others… It was strange. Unreal. There are parts that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to describe, parts I’m not sure I’d ever fully understand, no matter how long I might try.

“There is one part I will always remember very clearly, though. There came a time where no matter what I tried, nothing worked. I couldn’t fight, I couldn’t flee, I couldn’t struggle, I couldn’t even SAVE. Nothing worked, and I was sure that I was going to die for good. Even the human souls that had helped me before were too deeply absorbed to call out. They couldn’t save me this time. But thinking about them gave me an idea.

“The human souls couldn’t save me, but maybe I could save some of the other souls Asriel had absorbed.

“I called out to each of you; Papyrus, Sans, Undyne, Dr. Alphys, Toriel and you. You were all still in there, but you’d forgotten yourselves. I did my best to remind each of you of memories we shared to bring you back. Some were easier than others, but you all remembered. When you did and you were free, there was still one more soul in there who didn’t belong. Who wanted out. 

“It was Asriel.

“I didn’t understand. I didn’t understand how the one who was causing all of the destruction could also be a victim calling out for rescue. But it didn’t matter. It felt like there were two of him, one holding the other prisoner, and I did my best to SAVE him, too.

“He didn’t like it. I think he’d forgotten himself like the rest of you, but I had no memories to share with him. All I could do was call out to him, over and over, and not fight him. It’s all I could think to do, the only real hope I had that I could SAVE Asriel.

“…

“It worked. The Asriel that fought me, he screamed and kicked, hurt me so much that if I even breathed wrong I would probably die, but… he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t actually kill me. And eventually, he faded away, and all who was left was the Asriel who had been your son.

“He was crying. Even after everything he had done, I couldn’t leave him like that. He was so lonely and afraid. I wish I could have been his friend a bit longer.

“Asriel couldn’t last, though. The only reason he had a body like his old one was because of the huge power of all the souls he had absorbed. To keep a body he would have to keep the souls, and he wasn’t willing to do that. He was a good kid when he wasn’t a flower.

“Before he gave up the souls, though, he did one last thing.

“He broke the Barrier.

“It was like reality split apart, and when I woke up, Asriel was gone. But everyone else was back. None of you remembered what had happened, and I… I couldn’t find the courage to tell you all. The Barrier was gone, and we were all free. What else really mattered?

“We all talked a little, preparing to leave, and then… then we went to the surface.”

Frisk’s face, with eyes closed and a small smile curving their lips, was the most peaceful Asgore had seen it since the child had first appeared in his throne room. For a moment, he could believe that they were the age they appeared to be. Dirty and tired, yes, but still a child no older than Chara or Asriel had been before they had passed. It was easier to believe in that moment that they _were_ a child, and not some aged thing wearing a child’s body.

Asgore blinked, and shook his head to dislodge the ungenerous thought. Frisk had been through much, it was natural their experiences would leave a mark. 

When they opened their eyes again, the smile remained. Happiness shone in their eyes so brightly that Asgore felt his own heavy heart lighten. 

“It was amazing on the surface, King. To see everyone coming out, enjoying the sunlight for the first time, to hear them when they watched the stars - real stars come out that first night. Everyone’s wishes had been granted, and… I don’t think there’s any way to express or to describe the feelings happening just then. I hadn’t been caught Underground for very long, and was just experiencing their joy secondhand, and I don’t think I could properly explain even what I was feeling.

“On the surface, we all found our own ways to go, things to do. Papyrus got his dream car, Undyne and Dr. Alphys got together and found a place on the beach to live and watch a lot of anime, Toriel became a teacher, you became a gardener… I had nowhere else to go, so I stayed with Mama. She agreed to take care of me for as long as I needed. I didn’t tell her, but I was sure that I was never going to leave her again. Not really. I might get too old to be taken care of anymore and move out, but I would never _leave_ her. She would always be my Mama.

“It was all such a perfect happy ending. Everyone was safe, everyone was happy, everyone was free. I don’t think it was possible to even have a happier ending than the one we had right then.”

The child met his eyes, and he watched as the joy and youth he had just observed in them drained away, leaving behind the old, weary Frisk that had first appeared before them in the throne room. He suppressed a shudder, and thought that he had just witnessed something die.

“I want you to understand, I _need_ you to understand, King, just how _right_ it all was, just how perfect, this ending we had all reached and the new beginnings it promised. I need you to understand that, so you can understand…”

They swallowed, their gaze flicking away for a moment.

“So you can understand just how terrible it was when I RESET the second time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next part will be up next Saturday. Thanks for reading, everyone!
> 
> [You can follow me on tumblr here!](http://ehtarwrites.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter 3

Asgore blinked in surprise. 

On some level he knew that this could not have been the end of their tale, wherever it was meant to end. A happy ending was a lovely thought, and the one they described was almost too good to even be possible, one he had barely allowed himself to even dream of in his long years. But it was an end which must have had some hidden fault, some hidden danger which had come to life and stolen everyone’s happiness. It couldn’t have been as perfect as it seemed, because it obviously didn’t last. They were still - again? - trapped Underground. 

He hadn’t expected for the child to use the RESET power for no reason. 

_Had_ it been for no reason?

He looked at Frisk, who seemed to be having some difficulty in meeting his gaze. They chose instead to stare into a corner of the floor, their fingers twisting together into knots. 

Since they showed no sign of continuing without prompting, Asgore bent his promise to not interrupt until they were completely finished with their story. “Why would you do that, child, if everything had turned out so well?”

The words, _‘Why would you squander my dead son’s final act?’_ lingered on his lips, but he didn’t speak them. Frisk was clearly already upset, aware of the waste they had enacted without his adding to their burden. 

It took a moment for the child to respond at all, and when they did, they spoke so quietly they probably didn’t intend for him to hear. But there were advantages to large ears, and he could make out their mumbled, fervent repetition. 

“I am Frisk. That’s important. I am _Frisk._ ”

Before Asgore could decide whether he should respond to the odd mantra, Frisk looked up at him. Their expression stilled his tongue. It was perhaps the most upsetting combination of the deep bone weariness normally only found on those who had lived through the war, and the helpless, beseeching confusion of young children who no longer know which way they should turn. It was a combination Asgore had never thought to see. Now that he had, he fervently hoped never to do so again.

“I asked myself that at the time,” they said, and Asgore could see them struggling to choke the words out. “Everything was perfect, and yet… It was like I couldn’t help myself from using it, but I wasn’t _driven_ to do it. I wasn’t forced to use it, but it was just so _easy._ So easy it was almost an accident. Hard _not_ to do it. But I remember thinking that I should do it, hesitating, and then going ahead anyway. If it were really so bad to do, then surely it wouldn’t be so easy. Since it was, well then… why not?”

Frisk shuddered, and looked away again. Humans had no fur beside what was on top of their heads, but it was not so cold in his home as to be uncomfortable, he thought. But the child continued to tremble, ever so slightly. 

“An impulse,” they said quietly. “That’s what I tried to convince myself it was at first. A stupid impulse along with the awful kind of freedom that would allow it. Or nostalgia, maybe. Just wanting to go through it all again to ‘meet’ everyone for the first time and re-experience our adventures. Like a trip down memory lane you could actually experience.”

They shrugged, squeezed their eyes shut a moment. “It doesn’t matter what I thought, what reasons I came up with for why I had done it. I was back, we were _all_ back. Trapped. And I woke up, surrounded by golden flowers.”

“When I woke up, I didn’t move for a long time. I just stared up at the little patch of sky that I could see. I didn’t wonder when I would see it again, or wonder too hard why I was back. I didn’t think about much, for quite some time. I felt… strange. Out of place, but inside my own body. It was kind of like being numb, but still able to feel everything. It was just all… far away. My thoughts were the same way. Far off feeling and… like they were detached from me.

“When I finally got up, I moved quickly. I still felt strange, like I wasn’t really there, but I knew what I had to do to get back home. I’d already done it twice, one more time would be no problem.

“Flowey was the first to greet me, as always. Knowing what I did about him now, though, made it hard to talk to him. Knowing that he was just a scared kid stuck in a flower. But that feeling, too, was far away, like an echo.

“I did things different from what I had done before, and even though I knew Flowey didn’t remember me, he could tell from my actions that I… I had been here before. Done these things before. He knew right away, and I didn’t care.

“Mama showed up, like she always did, and protected me from Flowey. When I saw her I felt… strange. I was glad to see her, sorry she was back Underground and still so sad, guilty that I had done this to her for no reason… But somewhere in there, I was also angry. I thought maybe I was angry at myself, but I wasn’t. I was angry at Mama. At Toriel. And I didn’t know why.

“I didn’t understand it, so I followed her anyway, like I always did. We went through all of the same motions as we had twice before, so familiar now I could almost do it without paying attention. And the whole time, that feeling of anger stayed with me. As we made our way through the Ruins, it actually got worse. I was angry at Mama, then I started getting angry at the Ruins themselves, at the little noises they made, at the way the walls were so close together, at everything. The smallest things all only made it worse, and I could still think of no reason for it. It was a weird feeling, far away like all the rest, but it was everywhere.”

Frisk paused a moment and fidgeted, fingers twisting together, eyes wandering in search of some place to rest.

“The first time when I really noticed something was wrong, not just different but wrong, was when Mama brought me to the training dummy. She had me practice getting out of fights without having to hurt anyone. It was easy practice, all she wanted me to do was talk to it until she could come and take care of things for me. It’s not how things would work beyond the Ruins, but Mama knew nothing about that, so it was best to just play along. Besides, I knew now that the training dummy was inhabited by a ghost, a relative to others I would meet in the Underground, so I knew I didn’t want to fight it. I didn’t want to hurt it.

“But I took out my stick and I struck it down. With one hit, I killed the dummy and I didn’t even mean to.”

Frisk looked up at Asgore, and there was something different there, now. Before when they had admitted to killing, whether through a mistake or thinking that they had no other choice, their guilt and sorrow had been a palpable thing. Their distress had been so intense even after so much time that Asgore could feel it radiating off of them. Now when they looked at him… their eyes were blank. Empty, devoid of tears or feeling, save perhaps a terrible kind of determination to continue their story. 

“The dummy died, and Mama was horrified. I don’t think she knew the dummy was ‘alive,’ but she was still upset that I would disobey her like that, that I could show such a capacity for violence. All I had to do was talk to a practice dummy, something that couldn’t even hurt me, and I had destroyed it instead. I-- I don’t know what all I was feeling in that moment. I was surprised at myself, horrified like Mama, but at the same time it felt… good. It was exciting, made my heart beat faster, like swinging on a swing as high as you can go.

“I couldn’t understand myself or why I would feel like that. It was so wrong to think that killing something was good, and yet…! I almost reached for SAVE. Since I had RESET, it would take me back to where I had fallen, back to the flowers, to before I killed the dummy and I could start over. 

“As I was reaching for it, though, I stopped. I still felt strange, and I had the clear but faraway thought, ‘Why does it matter? I can RESET whenever I want, so why does it matter if someone dies?’ It felt horrible to even think that, but it… it was true. I _could_ RESET whenever I wanted… I didn’t need to do it now.

“So I didn’t go back. I left it alone, left Dummy dead, and kept going.

“And when I was attacked later by a Froggit, I barely hesitated. I killed them, too.

“The numbness was already spreading, and the whole time I just kept thinking ‘It doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter.’ It didn’t matter if I killed anyone, because I could always bring them back. It didn’t matter how much I broke everything, what awful things I did, because I could always fix it.

“And if I could always fix it, always put everything back to rights, then why shouldn’t I break everything, just to see what would happen?

“More monsters came, and I killed every single one. I was disgusted, felt sick… but I kept going. With every monster I killed, the anger got a little less, my EXP went up, and so did my LV. It was true that the more LV you have, the easier it is to cause even more hurt. The more I killed, the more numb I felt, the more distant my thoughts became. The more I killed, the more I was filled with only two real ‘feelings.’ Determination and curiosity. 

“I became curious what would happen if I just kept going. What would happen if I killed… and just kept killing? What would happen if I killed everyone? I had seen what had happened when I killed some, what happened when I killed none, what would happen if I killed every living thing that crossed my path? That awful, disgusting curiosity, combined with my determination…”

Asgore could not quite suppress the shudder that went through him. He had thought it terrible at first when they had spoken of killing, but then Frisk had felt the consequences of their actions deeply, mourned those they had killed. To hear it told flatly, almost emotionlessly in that child’s voice, that they _chose_ to kill for nothing more than curiosity’s sake, and the only reason they didn’t stop themselves was because there was nothing there _to_ stop them…

He felt a little ill. 

The child’s voice took on an odd, hollow quality as they related their horrors, as though they had to distance themselves from even the words, the memories of their actions. Their face became a mask, cold and inexpressive, the child behind it retreating as far back within themselves as possible.

“It wasn’t enough to just kill whoever came across my path. I had to kill everyone I could find. I searched through those Ruins, in every corner and crack for monsters to kill, until there was nothing left. Nothing but spiders and dust. Then I went to find Toriel.

“I went through the house, and felt a strange sense of familiarity. More than my previous times there. It felt more like ‘home’ than it ever had before, and I felt like I had actually spent a portion of my life there rather than just a few hours. 

“It didn’t matter, though. I knew my way around, and didn’t waste time. I looked for knives, but couldn’t find any. I looked for food and took what I could. There was no point in staying, not even to rest. I felt stronger than I ever had before, and I wanted to move on. I thought if I stayed then I would start to feel the terrible things I had done, but really, I just wanted to get going. I was impatient to… to…

“I moved on. I made Toriel show me the exit to the Ruins, followed her down, and fought her, just the way she wanted me to. She wanted me to show her how determined I was, to prove that I could survive outside the Ruins on my own.

“I proved that with only one hit.

“She looked so shocked. So frightened. So was I. Mama had died easily before, but not so easily as that. She said I must really hate her, and I remembered what I had learned once about monster souls, and how they could be weak to opponents. How if their opponent truly wished them ill, the damage they took would be so much worse. The more malice and wishing them harm, the more they could be hurt. 

“I didn’t think that I hated Toriel at all. I didn’t even want to hurt her. I just… it was just curiosity. Only curiosity. And yet I hurt her _so_ much.

“She died, saying that she hadn’t been protecting _me_ from the outside, but everyone out there _from_ me.

“Then she crumbled to dust. And I kept going.

“If I just kept going, I would get to the end of it all, see what happened, and then RESET. I would get us our happy ending back again, and then everything would be alright. I just needed to see what happened first.

“Flowey was waiting for me again. But this time he said something completely different than he had before. He said I wasn’t really human. That I was empty inside.

“He said I was Chara.

“He told me he had a plan to become powerful and to rule the Underground. A plan to become even more powerful than me and my stolen soul. He said we should work together and rid the world of everything here, these ‘useless memories.’ And then he left.

“I didn’t really understand what he meant. In the timeline before Asriel had called me Chara during our fight, but then realized he’d been wrong. That he was projecting on to me the friend he didn’t ever want to lose. It would make sense that he would forget that he’d realized once I _wasn’t_ Chara, since the RESET had taken all of his memories. But he seemed so completely sure of himself this time that I was Chara, it made me wonder. He’d never called me Chara so early before. 

“And I had no idea what he meant when he said I had a stolen soul.

“I went on, all the time wondering if I shouldn’t stop and RESET again right then. I had already seen some differences, and none of them were good. It was easier to kill as my LV increased, but that didn’t mean I was enjoying what I was doing. I was still causing pain, still causing suffering. Did it really matter if I could set it all to rights again later, when I was causing so much suffering now?

“But then I would think to myself, ‘It really doesn’t matter. No one will remember. It will be like none of this ever happened.’ And then I would think to myself how if I wanted to see how it would all end while following this path, then I had better do it now. Because there was no way I was going to be able to force myself to do it again.

“And wasn’t I determined to see what would happen?

“Wasn’t I determined to see how the story ended?

“I got to Snowdin, and I met the skeleton brothers, again for the first time. Here, things were even more different than before. The last time I had tried to make it seem like I had never done any of those things before, that I _didn’t_ know what was about to happen, and I still managed to mess it up in small ways. Enough so some people noticed. 

“This time… I didn’t even try. What was the point, I thought? What was the point in making anyone believe that I was normal, when I planned to kill everyone anyway?”

Here the child’s voice cracked. The distance they had managed to keep had slipped, and their eyes shone bright with tears that refused to fall. Their chin trembled, and Asgore was shocked at his own relief to see it. It proved that whatever came out of their mouth, whenever heinous things they admitted to, they were not so empty _now._

“Sans and Papyrus… they were my best friends out of anyone in the Underground. They watched over me, made me laugh, made me feel like I wasn’t alone the whole time. Papyrus had given me his phone number in previous timelines, and could be depended on to answer his phone wherever I was. And Sans, he always seemed to be near. Even when I couldn’t see him, it was like he was right there. I never doubted that he was always just around the corner. They both believed in me. They never stopped believing in me, in rooting for me. They never wavered in being my friends. 

“And I realized now that I was going to have to kill them. My best friends.

“And that made me realize just how many people I was going to have to kill if I _really_ wanted to know what happened. It was the first thought I’d had in a long time that didn’t feel disconnected from me. It terrified me. I reached for the RESET power right then. No amount of curiosity would be worth what I was thinking of putting everyone through. Nothing I might see or experience would be worth the price we would all have to pay in order to get to it.

“I didn’t want it anymore, I didn’t _care._ I just wanted… I wanted our happy ending back. And I reached for the RESET, ready to start it all over again. 

“I wish - I _so_ wish I had.

“Something stopped me. I don’t know what it was, but something froze me in place, and I couldn’t reach that power. I tried again and again, but whatever it was that had a hold of me wouldn’t let go. Before long, the numbness crept back into me, and… and it was like I didn’t care anymore. I still felt sad, deep inside, and thought I should stop, but it was overridden. 

“‘It doesn’t matter.’ 

“Curiosity… Determination.

“Nothing went right. The brothers could tell, even though they had never seen a human before, that something was wrong with me. So could I, but I still didn’t care. I didn’t solve any of their puzzles, didn’t play their games, didn’t laugh at their jokes. I didn’t do anything I didn’t absolutely have to, and… and I hated it. Papyrus was confused and upset, and Sans… he was like Flowey. He said I wasn’t human, but that it would be nice if I kept pretending.

“For some reason, that comment was one that hurt the most.

“I killed more. I went through puzzles that gave me no choice, but even those, Flowey was helping me. I knew all the solutions, but Flowey’s help made it so I went through it all even faster. 

“I hunted down everything, just as I had in the Ruins, until there was no one left. Every Snowdrake and every dog, I killed every one, their dust mixing with the snow. Where no one would notice.

“Word of me must have gotten ahead. With all of Dr. Alphys’ cameras around, I wasn’t surprised, but the entire town of Snowdin was evacuated, except for one kid who didn’t know any better. 

“It was strange going through the town when it was empty. It was worse than a ghost town, because I knew there _ought_ to be people around. It was just so… quiet, when it should have been alive with lights and chatter. It was all so _wrong._ There wasn’t even anyone in the shop… so I just stole what I needed. The only sign of the shopkeeper was a note begging me not to hurt her family. 

“I left town. I knew what was about to happen, and yet I still went forward. I thought to myself, ‘What else is there to do?’ and… the thought of RESETTing didn’t even occur then.

“I went out and met Papyrus. It was strange. As he was talking, I would take steps towards him without meaning to. It was like I wasn’t even in control of my body any more. The same thing had happened before with puzzles, but I hadn’t really noticed. I thought it was just the numbness affecting me. But I wasn’t numb, now, and it was still happening.

“Papyrus… he said things to me. Things that made me realize just what I must look like, just how scared he was of me. Not just confused or worried, he was _scared._ It hurt to know that. And yet… _he still believed in me._ Papyrus was terrified of me and yet he still-- still believed that I could be a good person. That I could change. And he wanted to help me.

“He didn’t even try to fight me. When I came closer, he held open his arms in a hug. To me. This person his brother said wasn’t even human, who he was terrified of, he was offering a hug.

“And I killed him.

“In one hit, I completely murdered someone I’d called a friend. His head came clean off, and I guess because he’s a skeleton, he was still able to talk. 

“ _He still believed in me._ I had just killed him, and he was still saying how he thought I could be a good person, if I just tried a little harder. 

“He crumbled away to dust, promising that I could do it, if I just tried.”

Tears streamed down the child’s face now, silent and steady. Asgore didn’t dare say anything now, to offer so much as a tissue to them. He felt certain that if he did, then whatever courage was holding this small human together in order to relive these horrors would crack, and they would never be able to begin again. 

“I cried then, too,” they said, not deigning to wipe away their tears. “My face was cold and I could feel the tears going down my face. But even crying, I didn’t stop. I walked right through Papyrus’ dust and kept going.”

“It was when I was able to stop crying that I finally noticed, really noticed. Noticed all of the dust on me. Papyrus had mentioned it, but I hadn’t seen it before. I don’t know how. I was caked in it. It was in my eyes, in my hair, under my nails… I could taste them, the friends I had killed, clinging to the back of my throat. 

“When I stopped crying I also noticed that even though I hadn’t been paying attention to my surroundings at all, I had still walked a long way. I had still killed plenty of monsters that had gotten in my way, all without paying the least attention. It didn’t seem possible, to be able to kill without even noticing. 

“I finally started to figure it out.

“Your Majesty, you know the physiology and traditions of your own people even better than I do. You know that when a monster falls down they become dust, body and soul. Traditionally, that dust is scattered over their most beloved object, so they can remain in some sense with their loved ones. I don’t know how literal that tradition is meant to be, if a monster’s soul is really supposed to live on as a vase or a book, but I can tell you it’s not a metaphor.

“All of the monsters I had killed, their dust was covering me from head to toe. I had _breathed them in,_ and they had become a part of me. When I concentrated, I could _feel_ them inside me. 

“It was weird and horrifying. I had killed these people, and now they were all stuck inside my head. I panicked a little. If they were inside with me, then they would _really_ see what an awful thing I was. Not bad enough to just know that I was a killer, now they would all know why I was a killer. Just because I could. 

“I tried to ignore them, but it was hard once I knew they were there. It didn’t help that to ignore them I had to pay attention to the outside, and outside I was still killing more.

“That was when I finally figured it out. It was when I tried being a part of the ‘me’ that was killing that I realized that there were two ‘me’s.’ It was only when I noticed the crowd of souls building up inside me that I finally noticed that I was a part of the crowd, and that the me that was still killing…

“That wasn’t me.”

They looked up at Asgore. Their tears had left two clean tracks through the dirt on their cheeks. They looked at him with something akin to fury, but not directed at him. 

“I. Am. Frisk,” they said, very clearly and distinctly. “I’m Frisk, and that’s important. I’m not innocent of terrible things. I’m not naïve enough to think that just because I can ‘make it better’ means I can do whatever I want. _But I am not **that**._ ” 

“I’m Frisk, not the one who killed everyone. That was someone else. Someone else was in control of my body, had been taking it more and more, with every monster we killed, until all I could do was watch along with every other soul stuck inside. When I tried to stop, nothing happened. When I reached for RESET, or just an old SAVE, nothing happened.

“I was trapped, with no way of breaking free. All I could do now was watch as this… this _thing_ went around in my body, killing all of my friends. And the worst part of it was I knew that I had _let_ it happen.

“If I’d just… just stopped after that first kill, or the second or the third… if only I hadn’t used the RESET power after we’d all gotten our happy ending…

“But I hadn’t, and now I was stuck - we were all stuck with the consequences of my decisions. Stuck with this _thing_ that only wanted to kill everything in its path.

“It didn’t take long to figure out who it was that had us trapped. All I had to do was remember what Flowey had said, not so long ago. 

“It was Chara.

“Somehow, I had no idea how, Chara had come back from the dead and wiggled their way into me. Flowey had said that they stole my soul, and it certainly felt like that’s what had happened. Except that I had… I had helped them do it. I didn’t fight back when I could, and now it was too late.

“We kept going. It got harder and harder to find people, which made me just a little bit happy. People were running from us, saving themselves. I didn’t even see Sans anymore, though he had always been so close before. I didn’t want to know what he thought of me now. Papyrus had died believing in me… but I didn’t think the same thing would be true for Sans. Not after killing his brother like I did.

“Though sometimes I thought I saw someone in a hood, just out of the corner of my eye.

“When we got to Waterfall, we hunted down every living thing, just like we had in the Ruins and in Snowdin. It was impossible to stop, but I still tried. It never worked. But in Waterfall there was Undyne. She knew what we were doing, and she was determined to stop us. She did stop us from killing a kid by jumping in the way. Instead of killing the kid, I… _Chara_ sliced right through Undyne.

“She told the kid to run, that she would be fine. Then she started to die. I felt myself start to cry, felt Chara feel so happy because of all the EXP we were about to get… felt all the other souls inside me cry out to see Undyne fall.

“But Undyne didn’t fall. She started to, her whole body started to turn to dust, when… she pulled herself back together. I’d never seen anything like that before. But I had felt it, I had done it myself. With DETERMINATION, Undyne refused to die. I didn’t think monsters were capable of that kind of determination. Not after reading everything in Dr. Alphys’ lab. But Undyne… she’s something special. She felt the hopes and dreams of everyone around her, and she let those fill her up, just like DETERMINATION. She’d grown up surrounded by the wishes of everyone trapped here, and now with this threat in front of her, she wasn’t going to let me go and take them all away. She wasn’t going to let us steal everyone’s dreams. 

“And it was more than just the Underground. Undyne knew that if we got out, if we made it to the surface, that we would just keep on killing. We wouldn’t stop with monsters. We would kill _everything._ And with the power of all of the souls we were taking… would could do it.

“Undyne fought us, and even though we hit her, over and over, she didn’t fall. The same hits which had killed everyone else with single blows, she was taking it all and dishing out just as hard.

“She killed us. It was the first time we had died since we began to kill everyone else, and I was ludicrously happy to die. I thought it would be over. 

“But it wasn’t. I barely had time to blink before Chara LOADed, and we went right back again to kill Undyne. This time we were even better prepared, we knew some of what to expect, and we fought even better than the first time. 

“We died several times. Undyne was hard to beat, and every time we died I hoped it would be the last time. That we wouldn’t come back. But we did, and eventually, Undyne fell.

“Undyne fell, and then she became a part of us.

“I didn’t know what was worse. Killing my friends, them thinking it was me… or knowing for certain that it wasn’t… once they were a part of me.”

Frisk sighed and rubbed their face. Their tears had dried, but the motion still smeared the dirt on their cheeks. For an instant they looked like a child again, and not a demon. 

“Then there was Hotland. Hotland had Dr. Alphys’ lab and Mettaton. I never saw the doctor, but Mettaton said she was evacuating people ahead of me. Undyne had said the same thing, right before she finally died. Mettaton refused to fight at first, and he left. 

“We hunted through Hotland and then the Core until there wasn’t anyone left. Until no matter how long we called out, nobody came.

“We found Mattaton. He was ready for battle. Dr. Alphys had given back all of his anti-human features in an attempt to stop me. Looking at him, I was actually hopeful he would succeed. But he didn’t. Not even close. He died with one blow, and became a part of us.

“And we kept going. 

“We were so close to the end. Our LV was at nineteen, our EXP… was high. I could feel how excited Chara was to be so close to the end, so close to escape. I tried, I tried so hard to make it stop. I tried everything I could think of, even talking to them. But they ignored me, and every other thing I tried failed as well. There was nothing I could do. 

“And then we came to the Hall. And we found that same old friend that had met me there the first time I’d gone through. He was still alive, and he was waiting for me. 

“We met in the corridor, and he was smiling at me. But he was angry. He never stopped smiling. I don’t think he could stop. He talked to me… said things. He called me a monster. But not the good kind of monster. The kind of monster that’s actually a demon. 

“He was my best friend, and he looked at me, and said kids like me should burn in hell. He reminded me of all the things that I had done, that _Chara_ had done, but it was _me…_

“He smiled, but he didn’t have a choice. I smiled, and _I_ didn’t have a choice. But I could cry, and it seemed like that was the only choice I really had left. 

“We fought. It was the first time I had ever fought this friend, and I was shocked at how good he was. Better than Undyne. I was shocked at just how determined he was to kill me, how much he _wanted_ to kill me. 

“I wanted him to kill me. I deserved it. And he did! He killed me. Over and over and over. I so wanted to stay dead, but I couldn’t. Chara wouldn’t let me. Chara had my DETERMINATION, and we kept coming back. 

“As we fought, he told me things. How he knew about the timelines I was using, how an anomaly was making them jump back and forth, and sometimes stop completely. He said that _I_ was that anomaly. He knew more than I had ever thought he did, and that knowledge took away his hope. Hope for anything, even going back to the surface. Because at any moment, it could all be RESET, with no warning or memories. It was why had had given up a long time ago. 

“I lost count of how many times we died, how many times he killed us. He kept track for a while, but eventually he stopped counting, too. 

“Then, finally, we came to a point where he was tired. He was using so much magic, it was impossible for him not to be. Chara was tired, too. He said… he said he could see me. _Me. Frisk._ A glimmer of the person I once was, a memory of who I could have been, of someone who had been his friend. He asked me to put down my weapon, and we could forget everything. 

“I almost couldn’t believe it. Even after all I had done, he… he was still willing to forgive me like he had before. I didn’t understand how he could, but it gave me such hope… Chara was exhausted, and his MERCY gave me the strength I needed to take back my determination, just long enough to SPARE my best friend. 

“He was so relieved when I dropped the knife. I was so relieved that I was finally, _finally_ able to take back control. I ran to him, hugged him, and just cried. I had done so much bad, and Chara had done so much more, the only way to fix it all would be to RESET. But right then, I just needed a minute to cry. 

“Except he killed me before I could. While he was still holding me, he killed me, and he told me that if I was ever really his friend, I wouldn’t come back. 

“…

“I tried not to. But the control I took back didn’t last long, and Chara was angrier than ever, now.

“When he made that offer again, Chara held on too tight for me to give up again. But I tried. I tried _so hard_ to tell him yes, there was a piece of me still in here, to help me. That if he wanted to help me he would kill me and make sure I _stayed_ dead.

“But I couldn’t. All I could do was smile, and cry, and try to kill my best friend. The last one, except for two.

“It took a lot. So many times we died and had to LOAD, but… finally, we did it. We killed him. And there was nothing left in our way up to you.”

Frisk sighed, eyes once again locked to the ground… or rather, _not_ the ground. The bowl of golden flowers they had set aside, and which was still sitting on the floor before the fireplace. They rubbed at their arms, as though they were cold, and Asgore saw that once again, they had begun to tremble.

“There was no one left to stop us on our way up to you. As we got closer, the only one who came… was Flowey. He kept… _talking_ on and on about what had happened to him, how he’d become a flower, and how he learned to SAVE and LOAD. He talked about how he had no feelings any more. No compassion, no love, nothing except curiosity. 

“I was so tired, I barely listened. It didn’t matter what Flowey had done, or what he thought. I could tell, despite what he was saying, that he wanted to be friends. He wanted to be friends with Chara again. He was so desperate to have that back, he didn’t see it until it was way too late. But I knew. Chara’s thoughts were louder than mine, now. I knew that Flowey was going to die, just like the rest. 

“The only thing he said that I really listened to was when he tried to figure out how Chara came back. How she must have taken their body to the Ruins to bury it. The only thing Flowey couldn’t figure out was what had woken them up, what it was that brought them back. 

“But I knew. And the knowledge made me feel sick. 

“Something finally got through to Flowey. Something that Chara did, some face they made, it finally made him realize what Chara was, what they would do to him if given the chance. He started to shake. He got worried about ‘back then,’ afraid Chara would hold it against him.

“They wouldn’t have, but Flowey was right to be scared. Chara didn’t care what had happened in the past. They were going to kill everyone regardless. 

“Flowey ran off. Ran to warn you, but it didn’t work. When we got to you, you didn’t do a thing to try and stop us. You didn’t even think we were human… I guess, by then, we weren’t anymore. 

“I want to say that I tried to stop what came next, but I knew it wouldn’t work. All I could do… was watch as you were killed. Without hesitation, without mercy. You died, King, with only one blow. And then Flowey delivered the blow that destroyed your soul.

“He did that to try and prove that he could be useful, that he ought to be spared. Even then he saw how useless it was to try and reason with Chara, and he started to beg. When he did, he started to beg with Asriel’s voice, with Asriel’s face.

“Chara killed him. They sliced him to pieces, until there was nothing left. 

“…

“And then we were alone. And Chara finally decided to talk to me. 

“They told me what I had figured out. It was _me_ that had woken their soul after all this time. It was my human soul and my DETERMINATION which had brought them back. And it was my ‘guidance’ which led them to the murderous path they had decided to take.

“It was all over. There was nothing left. They offered to erase this world, so we could move on to the next. 

“It might have been pointless, but I was given a choice, so I took it. One last little act of rebellion. 

“I said no. 

“I was right. It didn’t matter what I said. The world… it came apart.

“I don’t know how long I waited, or even where I was. I just… couldn’t let go. I couldn’t believe it was really all over. I might have been dead, just a soul floating in the Abyss once there was no reality left to cling to. I don’t know. But after what felt like forever, I heard their voice again. Chara. 

“They said it was my fault. I was the one who had pushed the world to its destruction, and yet I wanted to go back. They said that I couldn’t accept what I had done, that I thought I was above consequences. 

“I didn’t think that was true. Not at all. But it didn’t seem to matter. Not any more. 

“Then they offered me a deal. If I gave them my soul… they would bring back the world. 

“I didn’t trust them. I knew there must be some sort of trick or loophole, or they were just toying with me like Flowey had done. But… the entire world, for just my soul. It didn’t seem like so bad a deal. And besides, my soul was tainted, anyway. If I could bring everyone back and all it cost was my dirty soul, it was more than worth it.

“I agreed, and everything went black.

“I felt the world rushing back, all of it RESETTing, and then I was falling. 

“When I woke up, I was surrounded by golden flowers.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last part will be up next Saturday. Thanks for reading, everyone! ♥
> 
> [Come say hi on tumblr!](http://ehtarwrites.tumblr.com/)


	4. Chapter 4

Silence settled over them, heavy and suffocating. The child had ceased to speak, and sat with eyes closed and head bowed, exhausted by the telling of their tale. Asgore tried to understand what it could all mean. 

With each rendition of the child’s-- 

Frisk’s. They were _Frisk._ That was important. 

With each repetition of Frisk’s journey through the Underground it became more fantastic, less easy to believe or to attribute to such a young human. The latest was by far the least believable of the three. Human ghosts and possession, murder on a scale that was almost unfathomable, the destruction of an entire world and then the selling of a soul to get it all back again. It was without doubt the least believable story he had ever heard in his life, and he was being asked to believe that it was not only possible, but that it had happened, and that the human child sitting before him had lived through it all. It was a lot to ask. Almost too much.

Asgore believed every word of it. There was every reason to not believe, but it was those very reasons that had him accepting what Frisk said as the truth. It was all so far outside what anyone would think was possible, no one in their right mind would try to sell it off as true… unless it _were._

Asgore had watched Frisk closely as they told their tale. He watched their face, listened to their voice, and it all rang true. Frisk felt the story that they told. To them it was more than a story - it was memory being relived, it was the reality that they existed in, being explained to someone who might not believe them. 

Asgore believed them, and wished he didn’t. If everything Frisk said was true, then what did all of that mean now?

They had all died, some multiple times, and been brought back with the power of RESET. His children had planned to save the Underground, and in the process had killed themselves. 

His children, somehow, lived on, one in a flower and the other…

Frisk’s head was still bowed, their breathing occasionally hiccupping as they wept quietly.

If all that they said were true - and he did believe that was so - what did that mean for the child sitting in front of him? They said they were Frisk, repeated it as a mantra and a reminder, but if they gave their soul to Chara to bring back the world, then where was Chara? Were they still out there somewhere, independent and with Frisk’s soul? If that were the case, then how was Frisk sitting before him? If Chara were still out there, and Asriel too in the form of a flower… and Toriel was in the Ruins…

Could he get his family back?

* * *

Asgore set down a fresh cup of steaming tea before Frisk, along with a small plate of cookies and a box of tissues. They hadn’t asked for any of those things, and had in fact refused them when they’d been offered earlier, but… Asgore was still a father. Bereft of his children, the instincts and drives of a father remained. He couldn’t watch a child in pain and not comfort them in some way. Embracing them seemed too much for how short a time they’d known each other - at least from his perspective - so comfort must come in the form of care. 

At first the child didn’t appear to notice the additions, but after a few moments they reached for the tissues and blew their nose. 

They sat, with Frisk slowly working their way through their cookies and tea, and Asgore waiting patiently. 

There were probably other ways Asgore could have responded to the revelations laid before him, other actions he could have taken against the potential _thing_ that had told it all to him… But none of them seemed right. He might be having tea with his own murderer, but better to do so in companionable silence. 

Time passed, the cookies were eaten, the tea drunk and the tears dried. Frisk raised their head, and even more of their face was washed of dirt, their eyes red rimmed.

“You were right,” Asgore said. “It only becomes more unbelievable the further along we go. And yet I believe you. That it all happened exactly as you say it did. I have so many questions that I hardly know where to begin with them all. But,” he attempted a smile, “I get the feeling that your tale is _still_ far from over.”

Frisk smiled back, but it was a reflexive move, devoid of any real feeling. “For how much time passed for me to get from that moment to this, we’ve barely started. For how much is left to actually tell… we’re nearly finished.”

Asgore nodded, and settled himself in his chair as best he could, ready to hear the last of Frisk’s adventures. With a deep breath and final scrub at their nose with a tissue, they went on.

* * *

“I woke up in the same place I always did, with sunlight streaming down on me, laying in the spot where Asriel’s dust had scattered and where Chara had been buried. I was confused, terribly confused. I had just given my soul to Chara so they would rebuild the world we had destroyed. Now the world was definitely back, and I was in it like always… but I didn’t feel any different.

“I had learned a lot about human and monster souls since I had come to the Underground, but I had no idea what was supposed to happen when you gave your soul to someone else. I thought it would mean that I would… I would die, and that Chara would come back to life, I suppose. 

“But I was alive. I felt like myself, and I was back at the beginning, like nothing at all had happened. I couldn’t believe it. I started to wonder if what had happened was just a really long, vivid nightmare. I wondered if I was dreaming now, and would wake up with the world on fire. I worried that it was some sort of trick, an illusion to make me think that everything was fine before snatching it all away. 

“I lay there a long time, waiting for something to happen. I felt around inside my head, but no one was there but me. It actually felt really empty. I even called out loud for Chara, to see if they were close by, but I got no reply.

“I don’t know how long it was, but I started to hope. The longer I sat there and nothing happened, the more I hoped that- that everything was okay. That some kind of mistake had been made, and the world was back to how it had always been and I got to keep my soul. 

“When I finally did get up, I ran into Flowey like I always did. I panicked for a second. I didn’t know what he would remember, and the last time I had seen him… I didn’t know what _I_ would do, either. What if Chara was still a part of me and I just couldn’t feel it, and it wouldn’t be until they took control again that I would know?

“But Flowey acted like we had never met before, and if Chara was inside me, they did nothing. I was so distracted that I didn’t even dodge Flowey’s attack, which convinced him that we had never met before. He was ready to kill me, and Mama saved me, just like every time before. 

“The longer things went on, the more they went on just as they normally did. Nothing had changed, and I… I felt no urge to kill. Not even a little. The longer they went on, the more I began to hope that I could really put things right, once and for all.

“’Once more,’ I thought to myself. ‘Just once more, and we can all have our happy ending. I’ll do everything right. We’ll have our happiness, and I’ll never use the RESET power ever again.’

“So, I went through it all again, for the fourth time. I was careful, doing my best so no one could tell I had done it all before. I was nicer to everyone than ever before, trying to be as kind as I possibly could, to be the best of friends with everyone. I even tried making friends with Flowey when I saw him, but that never worked.

“I never earned a single EXP. I never went past LV 1. I did everything there was to do, saw everyone there was to see and heard all they had to say. I made friends with everyone, did my best to solve those problems that I could. It was exhausting, but all worth it if we could all have the ending we wanted. 

“I reached the Barrier, and everyone was there. Everyone was captured by Flowey, and I fought Asriel all over again. It was harder than ever to fight him then, with all that I knew. Having fought him before didn’t make it any easier a second time, but I was determined. We _would_ have our happy ending.

“I won the fight, and it was like it was before. Asriel broke the Barrier and then handed back the souls he had taken, so he would become Flowey again.

“That’s the one thing I think I really got wrong. I never found a way to save him, too. It wasn’t fair, after all he’d been through, to be stuck alone as just a flower with no compassion. I wish I had found a way to save him.

“We got to the surface for the second time, and it was even better than the first time. I almost didn’t believe it. I expected to wake up or for something terrible to happen, now when it seemed like everything was perfect. But it didn’t, and we all went off as we had before, to find where we all fit in the world above.

“And then… it all RESET.”

* * *

Asgore wasn’t surprised be the revelation of another timeline having been RESET. He had an awful premonition of what he thought he could expect of Frisk’s account, and if he was right, there would be many, many more of them. No, what surprised him was how plainly it had happened. No disaster forced the RESETing of the world.

He looked at the child, brows drawing together. Frisk stared back, face blank, but it was the kind of blank stillness that betrayed a storm beneath the surface. 

He was about to speak, though he was uncertain what it was that would make it out of his mouth, when Frisk beat him to it. Their voice trembled in places, again betraying the storm they held in check. 

“We got… our happy ending back again. It was perfect. Everyone was alive, and everything was good. And then I used RESET again.”

Asgore’s frown deepened. “ _They_ used RESET again?” It was the only possibility that would make sense in this point of their story, but--

“ _No,_ ” Frisk tossed their head quickly in denial. “I did it.”

“Why?”

“I had to!” They caught themselves on the brink of allowing the storm free. “… I had to do it. Everything was perfect, the way it had been before, but something was still… It was different. Nobody else remembered the awful things I had done, but _I_ did. I remembered it every time I looked at one of you, whenever you would say a stray word that was at all like that time… It was like it didn’t matter that it was all alright now. I couldn’t escape what had happened, even when it _hadn’t_ happened in that timeline.”

“I had nightmares. Of course I did. I relived what had happened, what I had done, over and over, and when I woke up I had to face all of you during the day, with all of that still in my head. It was enough to drive anyone crazy. Which was why I thought I was going crazy when it first started to happen. 

“In my nightmares, it was all like it had been during that time, including Chara. But they were also a little different. They talked more to me than they ever had outside of the nightmare. They… they _knew_ it was a nightmare, a dream, and they mocked me about it. That was bad enough, but then they… _they followed me out._

“I would wake up and Chara would still be there, still talking to me. Telling me what a good job I did. Saying how happy they were that they had someone to play with now… They kept saying how much fun it would be to play the game again, but this time above ground. How much fun it would be to kill everyone now that I was their best friend, their _Savior,_ to see the betrayal on their faces, killing them now.”

Frisk swallowed hard, a shadow of panic flickering in their eyes. “I-- I couldn’t risk it,” they said, with a desperate edge to their voice, a need to convince, to be believed. “I _couldn’t._ Even if Chara wasn’t there and I was just going insane, I couldn’t risk… I mean… What if they took control again? What would I do if they took control and killed everyone? Before coming to the Underground, I couldn’t RESET. What if I couldn’t do it anymore after leaving the Underground - if it faded away? What if it faded away and I couldn’t RESET after everyone was killed? Then what?”

“I couldn’t risk it… I couldn’t stand to see everyone dying, not again. I couldn’t _kill_ everyone again.

“So I RESET everything. I sent us all back, because I couldn’t stand to kill them again. And if after killing them I couldn’t get them back…

“I RESET, and started it all over again. At least then I knew I could be with everyone, and maybe then I could find a way… a way to get rid of Chara. It was worth a shot. What else could I do?

“I hadn’t expected things to turn out that way. Chara had my soul, and my DETERMINATION, but I was still there too. In a way it was worse than anything I had thought would happen, because I could watch. I could struggle to make it stop. I think maybe that was why they kept me around.

“After I RESET, I tried to find some way of undoing what had been done, of taking Chara out of me, or me out of Chara, without destroying the world to do it. But I was so limited in what I could do. I needed help, but who could I go to? There was no real way I could tell any of you what had happened, no way to explain what was going on, that I had a - a ghost in my head.

“What if you asked who it was? What would I tell you?

“So I did the best I could on my own. And when it didn’t work, I RESET us again.

“And again.

“And again.

“And again.

“… and again…

“… I don’t know how many times I’ve RESET now. Every time I searched for some way to get rid of Chara, to find a happy ending so that we could all just… But I never found a way. They stayed with me.

“Sometimes I would make a mistake and somebody would die. Sometimes Chara would take control for just long enough to kill someone, or make it so they died and I couldn’t save them. Sometimes we got our happy ending, but Chara was always there, too, and I could never trust that they would leave it alone…”

“How…” Asogre cleared his throat. “How _long_ has all of this been going on?”

Frisk shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know. I don’t know how many times I’ve done all of this, over and over. I don’t know how many times I’ve seen you all die in different ways. I don’t know how many times I’ve taken away everyone’s happiness after giving it to them. But I think… I’m much older now than I was when I fell.”

Looking at the human sitting before him, he had no difficulty in believing that. From the moment he had set eyes on them he had felt that they were aged beyond their years. He had assumed it had been their journey through the Underground that had been responsible for that. In a sense he had been right, but not in the way he had thought. Nor any way that he would have guessed.

He waited for Frisk to continue, but they remained silent. He sensed there was still more to their experiences, with so many iterations of the same events that they were hinting at there would surely have to be, but whatever else they had gone through, they seemed content to keep to themselves. Now they sat quietly, hands on the table, eyes on hands, and let the silence stretch. 

It was a fair attitude to take. They had already bared more of their own soul than even the most intense battle could manage, and more than Asgore believed he could ever do himself had their positions been reversed. If there were some things they still wished to keep private, then that was their decision. He wouldn’t push. He wasn’t even certain he _could_ push for more at this point. With all they had already told him, did he really want to hear more? More which might be even worse than what had already been told?

No. No, he didn’t think he could.

He leaned back, the chair creaking in protest, and set himself to some serious thought. 

Asgore knew himself to not be the best kind of King monsterkind could ask for. He was a Boss, as had been his ancestors, which was a desirable trait to have in a leader, though not strictly necessary. But when the leadership of their people was hereditary, passed along only when the previous leader fell, it was good to know that political upheavals caused by ascensions would be far apart. It was also comforting for the people to know that their leaders were, by definition, some of the strongest monsters around.

At least the strongest soul wise. Whether or not they were also strong in mind, body or magic depended entirely on the individual. Asgore didn’t think himself terribly deficient in any of those areas, but he was soft hearted. Soft heartedness was a desirable trait in his opinion, but it did make the decisions that needed to be made as King of a country at war difficult. A war he had started out of fury and pain, the intense grief of losing two children in a single night. 

That was another of his weaknesses as a leader. He wasn’t unintelligent, but he didn’t have a mind made for politics. A mind that could strategize, plan ahead on all the levels required, to take the puzzle pieces laid across an entire race and fit them into a good, cohesive whole. A really good leader would have reigned in his grief, or planned better once war was declared, or…

Sometimes he really missed Tori. She was the perfect balance to him, not just as a person, but as a leader. Without her, he foundered. Without her, the whole Underground was set to founder.

He wished, more than ever before, that she was beside him again. What would she have made of Frisk’s tale? Would she have believed it? Would she be disgusted with the human sitting before them, or would she be filled with pity, with compassion? What would she suggest they do?

What would _he_ do? Toriel was not beside him, however much he might wish it otherwise, and she was not at his side entirely through his own actions. This was his riddle, and he would have to solve it himself. 

Frisk was here, and they were explaining as best they could all that had happened. Obviously they had yet to find a solution to their problem, and just as obviously, they were getting desperate to find that solution. Out of those innumerable repetitions of their quest they must have tried every possibility, every combination of possibilities to find something that would work, and none of them had. It was possible that this was not the first time they had told him this story. In another timeline, they might have sat down with him, drunk tea, and asked him to believe the impossible tale they were about to tell.

If they told him before, had he believed? What would he have done if he had not?

It didn’t matter. He believed, he truly did, that everything the child told him was true. The question was… what now?

If Frisk was telling him everything, then they thought doing so would somehow help to solve their problem. They thought that Asgore could help them somehow. To remove Chara from them, or them from Chara, to break that deal…

Chara. They were a part of Frisk now, sharing their soul and their body. His child’s soul, lost for so long was sitting so close by, just across the table from him. And Asriel, too, was out there somewhere in the form of a flower. 

Both of them, Asriel and Chara, they were… twisted out of their true shapes. And small wonder with all they had been through. But according to Frisk’s own words, Asriel was not so far from healing as to be unreachable. And if he could be saved, then surely Chara could be as well…

_Of course,_ Asgore thought. He had no idea how to separate two human souls which had somehow become fused - something which was always considered an impossibility by all accounts - but if Frisk had come to him because they thought he could somehow _reach_ Chara…

He was their father. Their adoptive father, but their father nonetheless. Save for Toriel and Asriel, there was no one else in the entire Underground who shared so many memories with Chara, who stood so good a chance of reaching them, of reminding them of themselves and bringing them _back._

He could have Chara back, and then they could go out and find ‘Flowey’ and bring back Asriel, and then, then…

Then they could all have a _true_ happy ending. 

Asgore’s breath caught with the vision the thought presented. Was it possible? Well, why not, when so much else that seemed impossible had happened? 

If all of that, why not this as well?

It would be perfect. Against all the odds, despite all the pain and grief of all these years, it could all be as it was meant to be.

Slowly, Asgore took a deep, steadying breath, and looked down at the human child sitting before him. They looked so much like Chara. It was no wonder Asriel had thought them the same. They had gone through so much to be here now, it was no wonder Chara had woken to their DETERMINATION. 

“It is… quite the tale,” he said at last. The child- Frisk looked up at him, eyes uncertain. Waiting. “And I do believe it is true. Every word of it.”

The relief that rushed through the child was so great Asgore could almost see it as a wave. He worried a moment that they would tumble from the chair with how slack their posture suddenly became. 

“Thank you.” The words were whispered, so quiet Asgore could barely hear them. He nodded, though the child couldn’t see it, a faint smile on his face. 

He shifted in his chair, arranging himself into a more kingly pose at the little table. “I am glad you told it to me. I know it must have caused you much distress to relive all you have been through, and I applaud your bravery. I also know you would not have told this all to me without some purpose in mind. Tell me, what is it you think I can do to help?”

For a moment the child seemed to shrink in on themselves, and they shuddered. When they spoke again it was so low Asgore could barely make out the words. 

“What did you say?” He’d heard, but didn’t want to believe what he’d heard.

Frisk looked up at him, eyes like holes looking into nothing. _“Kill me.”_

A shiver crept its way through Asgore at the cold, flat demand. He couldn’t process it. After all they had been through, this is what they came to him for? How would dying help? Was _this_ their happy ending?

“I don’t… understand,” he managed. “Won’t dying only send you back to the beginning of a timeline? If you wanted to die, then why come to see _me?_ Why tell me your story?”

Frisk shook their head. “No, you don’t understand. You have to kill _all_ of me, not just my body. You have to destroy my soul, _our_ soul, down to the last scrap.”

“What--!”

“It’s the only way! Don’t you see that? This was why I told you everything, so you would understand why it had to be done like this.” They gripped their shirtfront over their heart, small fingers forming talons in the fabric. “Chara and I… we’re stuck together. Forever. There’s no way to undo what’s been done. No one even thought this kind of fusion of souls was possible. No one will know how to undo it. And so long as Chara is around, no one is safe. They’ll always want more, and I… I won’t always be able to stop them. The only way to make this all stop is to make Chara stop. And the only way to do that… is to destroy us both.”

Asgore shook his head. “No, there must be some other way…”

The child - the children? - laughed. It was an awful sound. They stifled themselves with a hand, muffling the sound until the laughter passed. “Oh, yes,” they said breathlessly. “There are ways. _So_ many other ways. You’ve no idea how much difference even the smallest act can make. The smallest kindnesses, the smallest of atrocities. _You have no idea how many I’ve tried._ But none of them, _none - of - them_ lead to a better outcome than this. This is my last chance. Everyone’s last chance.”

Asgore attempted a smile. “But child, your DETERMINATION will save--“

_“My DETERMINATION will kill this world!”_ The scream reverberated off of the walls, along with the chair Frisk tossed aside as they leapt to their feet. Fresh tears marred their face, their tiny hands balled into fists. Despite himself, Asgore tensed, preparing. Just in case. 

“My DETERMINATION will kill this world and everyone in it. It already has! Over and over! I won’t let it happen again, not if it means…”

They stopped, and wilted in place, the fury already drained away.

“Even a human’s DETERMINATION can weaken,” they said, their voice very small. “It can tire, stretch out too far and never bounce back. That’s… Now I only have DETERMINATION for one thing: that all my friends live. All of them, and that they remain safe.”

They hugged themselves, talon fingers digging into their arms. “This timeline, I’ve done everything right. I’ve made all my friends, I’ve solved all the problems I can, left them all as happy as I possibly could. It’s the most I can do. Now, to make sure that it doesn’t all get taken away, I need to die. The best happy ending I can give them is to not be a part of it.”

A kind of numbness was wrapping itself around Asgore. He couldn’t understand why it felt so familiar at first, then understood. It was the same numb feeling which came over him when he had to kill a human. The same awful emptiness which filled him whenever he thought of Asriel, Chara… Tori.

“Very well,” he said heavily, a kind of sickness settling in the pit of his stomach. “Why me, then? Why do you think I am capable of doing this, and not someone else?”

“I’ve tried to just let myself die. No SAVE, no LOADing. Just… dying. But they won’t let me do that. If I don’t LOAD, then they do. Their soul is a part of mine now, and I can’t escape their meddling. No matter how suddenly I get us killed, we always come back. Their DETERMINATION… it’s even stronger than mine.”

“And why do you think this plan will work? If… if Chara is a part of you, then surely they can hear everything that we say, they know everything that you think. What is there to prevent them from countering this strategy?”

Frisk shrugged. “I don’t know. But I can usually feel when they’re about to do something, when they’re planning something. I’ve learned that much after so many RESETs. I can’t feel anything now. They’re not planning anything; just watching. Maybe they think it won’t work. Maybe they think that you’re too soft to do it.” They looked at him, the last scrap of their DETERMINATION shining through. “That’s why you _can’t_ be soft, King Dreemurr. You _must_ do this.”

“You are the strongest one here. If there is anyone capable of killing a human soul, it’s you. Even if you have to absorb the other six human souls to do it, you are the best chance we have. And besides…” They looked at him hard. “You’re not a LV 1.”

Asgore flinched, but couldn’t deny what the human said. Six humans in his past, and each of them had given many more execution points than any monster would. His level of violence was absurdly high for how few deaths he’d caused. And yet somehow, he still felt as though he could not separate himself from his actions any more now than he had when… when his hands had been clean. 

The child was still watching him closely as he thought, waiting for his decision. After some time they smiled. Asgore did not find it as comforting as they probably intended. 

“I would say to think of it as a trip to the dentist, but that’s not right. It’s more of a- of a game. Think of all of this as a game, and my soul - _our_ soul - mine and Chara’s, is what makes it possible to play the same game over and over. Without our soul, the game glitches, and it can never be played again. Then everyone inside the game can finally live as people, and not as playing pieces.”

Again, Asgore felt an odd stir of memory that brought no actual memories to the surface. Where had he heard this before… And what was he to do with this child who had thrown themselves on his MERCY, asking for the most terrible form possible?

It was not an easy decision to reach, and he could already feel his conscience bowing with the weight of it. But given everything Frisk had said, everything they had gone through to reach him, and all _he_ had done which had helped to lead the world to this point… there was only one thing he could even consider doing.

He nodded, head heavy with decisions which would surely drag him into hell. “Very well, then. Let us go and end this game once and for all.”

The child did not look relieved now. They only nodded, once, ready to face the fate they had asked for. 

When he stood he towered over the tiny human. He led them gently back through the castle, back to the Barrier. It was there where the canisters for the human souls, six full and one waiting, were stored. 

It was there where this human’s story would finally end. 

In the Barrier room, Asgore called forth the canisters, and a rainbow of souls appeared before them, only the red of DETERMINATION missing from the spectrum. Frisk walked down the line of them, looking in on each one, while Asgore watched. 

He felt… very heavy.

“You were… very brave,” he said to Frisk’s back. They didn’t turn around, though their shoulders tensed as they continued down the line of canisters. Asgore was glad. It was easier to do this if he couldn’t see their face. “I can barely fathom what it must have taken to make it through all you have done, what it took to get here.” Asgore’s fingers twitched, the beginnings of magic coiling around his claws. 

“It’s a shame, but I can understand why it was your courage finally failed you in the end.”

A rush of magic filled his hand, wind filled his ears.

Frisk stopped suddenly. They looked down and trembled. Asgore couldn’t see their face, but he could imagine their expression, and that was perhaps just as bad. 

“I can promise you, Frisk, that your courage, your DETERMINATION, your _sacrifice_ will not be wasted.”

The child fell to their knees, as much from the weight of the trident skewering them as its effect on their fragile body. They said nothing, didn’t even attempt any last words… didn’t so much as try to turn and lay eyes on their murderer before a final sigh escaped them, and their body crumpled to the ground, the trident fading to nothing.

Asgore shuddered, the horror of his betrayal felt all the way down to his heels.

_Just once more,_ he thought as he fell to his knees. _Just once more, one more murder, one more betrayal, and then it will all be better again._

The numbness giving away to a coldness in his limbs, Asgore crawled forward, scooping up the tiny broken body in his arms, the red of human blood, of human _DETERMINATION_ staining his clothes, his hands, the white of his fur. He looked on the face, dirty and small, and now so much younger, so much more peaceful in death, and smiled. 

Somewhere in this child’s soul was _his_ child. He would find them. He would find them and separate the two human personalities, no matter how long it took. He had a chance of regaining his family, he could be just as determined as any human. All he had to do was remove the soul, place it in the waiting canister, and then, then they would have all the time they needed.

He could have his family back.

_Once more,_ he thought, concentrating to draw out the precious soul. _Once more a murderer, Dreemurr, and you can have **your** happy ending. Once more, once more, once mo--_

* * *

… You looked for an ally…

But nobody came.

…

…

Ha.

Heh.

Ha ha ha ha ha…

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha HA HA HA HA HA!

…

I’m sorry. I really shouldn’t laugh, should I?

You tell a really good story, you know. You actually made it sound simple, one event leading into the next. Almost like it was all logical that it would end like this. Fated. Inevitable. 

_Not your fault._

Of course, you left some things out, didn’t you? Couldn’t tell the old fool everything. Who knows what he would have done with it all. Didn’t even tell the poor bastard he was your _third choice_ for last chance. Didn’t tell him that you tried all of this with Flowey, and then with Sans. Come to think of it, you didn’t say much about Sans, did you? I mean, you said plenty _about_ him, but you didn’t say it was _him._ Why is that, I wonder? 

Hmm? You’re still trying to protect that trash, even after what he did to you? Some best friend he turned out to be, huh? You’d think a friend would try harder to save someone who came to them for help.

Oh well. Just goes to show you can’t trust everyone. At least with me you know what you’re getting, right?

Still, for third choice, I think the old guy did the best. At least he put in some effort in the right general direction. Too bad about that selfish streak. You could tell, right? I know you could see it, the way he looked at us, the way he kept looking at those flowers. He thinks he can have his stupid family back. Idiot.

Hey, you think if you had actually told the whole truth he might have actually tried to do your plan? If he’d known that Flowey was dead for good he might have given up on me, too? Or do you think he would have held on to me even tighter? Want to try it again and see?

Poor old Azzy. Still soft, even without a soul. I guess that’s what happens when you take the form of a flower. How many RESETs did it take, without taking his memories, before he couldn’t take it anymore? Not very many… a few times in his real form, a few times being pulped by yours truly… one or two betrayals when he really tried to make a difference. 

Soft hearted moron, just like his father. Just like his mother, too. I can’t believe I used to call them my family. 

But that’s the worst of what you left out, isn’t it? There’s one huge detail you left out that changes the whole story… and you didn’t even hint at it. Well, once. But that barely counted. Don’t you think he deserved to know all of the players in this game?

Hmm. Maybe not. He probably wouldn’t have believed _that._ Sans did, but, well. We both know how that turned out. 

…

Still, this was a fun experiment. I enjoyed the trip down memory lane, heavily edited or not. Makes me excited, really. I can’t wait to see what you try next.

Because I love this game, Frisk. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of playing it, not with such a good playmate as you.

Hey, c’mon, Frisk. Don’t ignore me. I know you can hear me. Aren’t you excited to see those ‘friends’ again? I know I am. 

Hey.

Hey, Frisk?

…

_Let’s play again._

 

 

**[RESET] ... ... ... [QUIT]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s that.
> 
> So this story followed a timeline which was more or less how I played the game the first couple of times, minus the Genocide Run, as I chickened out of that immediately after Papyrus. I’m not sure what inspired me to write this, as I wrote it a while back, but I liked the idea of Frisk becoming fully aware of what they were, what was going on and whatnot. There’s more that could have been added with fan theories, especially when it comes to things like Sans, Papyrus and Gaster, but I decided to keep it fairly simple.
> 
> Want some more Undertale? Next Saturday will begin posting a new 5-part fic, "Through the Door." It'll be lighter in tone, with lots of bad puns and friendship feels! See you there! ♥
> 
> [I'm on tumblr, come say hi!](http://ehtarwrites.tumblr.com/)


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